I dislike Sundays. Make me some spaghetti, Jim.

Game of the goddamned year.

Right, that is the main concern. Not the assholes shooting up the joint.

Thinking about all the idiots who are going to say “But what was a 15-year-old doing out at 4 a.m.” is already making me so mad.

Wow. Condolences to the Gay family. No parent should ever bury their child.

[...]the below is how it appears in the HD remake of the game.

I live for comments like this.

Man I went into reading this thinking I knew exactly how it was going to go and I was wrong. The questions were good questions that got good answers. I don’t 100% support Cooks agenda but I understand and respect it. She doesn’t mind that fan service exists and doesn’t want it banned or to shun people who like it, she…

It’s hard to see when your head is in this position.

I was on Jeopardy about 10 years ago. He’s short and too tan and wears sleeveless shirts to eat lunch. Real fucking jabroni.

Sorry, Patrick, the correct title was “What is Alex Trebek Hilariously Shits On Jeopardy! Contestant And Her Whole Crew For No Reason”.

“First of all, [Donald Trump] has no game”
-Clare Malone, Fivethirtyeight

Obama is so handsome. Not just by comparison, but goddammit. It’s like putting a glass of French wine next to a half empty PBR that’s mostly backwash.

This is one of those Picture Worth a Thousand Word moments:

He turned me into a newt!

Does he weigh the same as a duck?

“Build a bridge out of him!”

Burning seems harsh. Can’t we first just toss him in a lake and see if he floats?

“But we ignored all of these warning signs for months in favor of bitching about Hillary Clinton not giving press conferences. We sure showed her!”