We had our dog for a while before we had the baby. His absolute preference for my husband in almost all situations prepared me for the tag-team ticker tape parade he and my daughter throw when my husband gets home. At which point Mommy is off the clock, so I'm pretty happy too.

It's a partner to "It's not personal". Actually, I take it pretty personally that you deny my gender something.

Oh, a slow rollout to ONLY 2000 stores. (Oh my God! How many stores do they have? Leave us alone, Wal-Mart!)

My husband doesn't quite understand why I always insist that the baby is last in, first out of the car.

Yeah, this does sound like something on a more sinister level. At least one parent seems involved and loving (I hope).

Oh my! A 2 year-old? They're usually still in diapers! This gives me major anxiety.

I think you're right that this is for CPS and not the police to investigate. On a side note, never read the stories of parents who accidentally (and fatally) left their children in hot cars. They are the saddest thing you'll ever read. (I find this story a very close second.)

Us too. My cousins HATED coming for dinner because they had to drink milk. I also used to sneak my glass of milk (which I would not finish during the meal itself) into the family room and pour it out behind the chair DIRECTLY INTO THE CARPET. My parents caught on when it started to smell.

Except hugely talented and cautious with his use of language, myth, and history. Also, in Greek and Roman literature, almost everyone after is Homer is derivative, purposefully.

This one. Totally acceptable.

A lot of my students would chat with them because of the free English practice. Or they found them cute. None of them became Mormons.

They could be Mexican or South American (often Paraguayan) Mennonites, who sometimes work as seasonal agricultural laborers in the US and Canada.

Agreed. There is a lot to be said for making well-cut, very flattering clothing for a woman's body, which many directional designers continuously fail to do. Apples and oranges. We need them both.

I have a friend who would do stuff like that ALL THE TIME. She lives far away from us, so always has some things she's done to convince us of (e.g. using coke) and then immediately back down from. Made all of us crazy (but we've known her forever so we put up with it out of duty). Then when she actually had to have…

The iPad thing reminds me of This is 40. The main couple is constantly worried about their financial issues but drive a brand-new Lexus and BMW and have a massive, beautiful house. Just drive normal cars and live in a smaller, but still nice house. There, saved you a few thousand a month.

Am I the only one who thought after his revelation of impending fatherhood, "Barney doesn't wrap it up? ICK!"

This is called the scours in cattle. It generally happens to calves who get diarrhea and have poop stuck to their fur which maggots are bred in. They eat into the flesh and it's pretty serious (and fricking disgusting).

Just to add, a microbiologist friend of mine gave a paper last year about how close the medical community was to declaring measles effectively eradicated in the West, but this is longer true because of anti-vaxxers. Thanks, gang. Way to not take that one for the team.

True. God forbid we act like a community when it comes to children...Or should I say poor children?

One of the reasons that large-scale daycare exists is that when women had to work in the 30s and 40s, they were often forced to leave very young children alone at home or in vehicles while they worked. Too bad we no longer consider this an important enough issue to improve such a situation in a meaningful way.