Giggity.

What would be igniting the fuel on the way out of the windshield nozzles? You know what, I almost don’t want to know.

My brother had this happen to him when a gas station had the wrong underground tank filled with diesel. He was one of about a dozen people who had an issue there on the same day, and the shop where he took his car shortly after took forever to fully rectify the damage it did to his fuel system. I felt terrible for…

I mean, I get what you’re saying, but I still laugh maniacally when “Boaty McBoatface” or its equivalent wins online naming polls because the admins can’t be bothered to learn that immature side of the internet (looking at you, 4chan) is often the most determined.

Well, that’s because you wrote lemon fanfics, right?

Mr. Feeny would certainly sound nonplussed, and despite his drunken state, I’m sure the Hoff would slap her if he heard your daughter say that.

I’m totally down with real-life Crazy Taxi. I will tip heavily.

I liked Lea Thompson’s appearance on the show, and Ryan Stiles summary of Back to the Future, even though he’d never seen the movie.

I knew I’d seen that panda somewhere before:

You have my unending adoration for this share.

“That’s right! Can’t kill me, motherfuckers!” As far as I’m concerned, this was the film that established Samuel L. Jackson’s persona. Well, this, and Pulp Fiction.

I mean, Bruce Willis already let that franchise die with A Good Day to Die Hard, and Charlize Theron and other actresses have already proven that women can do bad-ass action films as well as men (Atomic Blonde and Mad Max: Fury Road, for example), so I’m all for this.

Imagine that racetrack in Texas where all the flood-damaged cars were consolidated after Hurricane Harvey—I’m thinking that number of decrepit Jeeps.

I guess Hulkenberg can’t operate the KERS on the car without assistance from his ginormous dick. /sarcasm

Oh dear God, that Spoon NSX is perfect. Thank you for this, and I’m saving every one of these photos.

Can anyone hazard a guess as to why there are two sets of hood-pins?

This is my favorite comment of this whole fucking night.

I don’t care on what article this appears, I’m going to star it.

PREACH.

I thought this morning was going to be the happiest I’d be about this horrid election (before today’s fresh hell came to pass), but the voters have spoken: