Attention all current and future singers! Please ask yourself the following questions:  (A) Do I sound exactly like Tom Petty (or am I actually Tom Petty)?  (B) Is Mike Campbell here?  (C) Is Mike Campbell playing his guitar?

Me too.  Lana Del Rey crossed with Avril Lavigne.

During the Bruno Mars song, I turned to my wife and said "This is the worst musical I've ever seen."  And then started singing "Everyone Has AIDS" from Team America over it.  I'd like to see the full version of that musical or revue or whatever it was, because it seems to be the perfect storm of faux-Rent suckitude….

The next book will be entitled "Shadows and Tall Trees", and will be about Bean's kids getting really into early U2.

This week's lesson in Geobraverography:

Ding ding ding.  Hilty is SO MUCH BETTER at portraying a Broadway-caliber performer (because, of course, she is a Broadway-caliber performer) that it's starting to seem like the show is completely out of focus.

Up high.

I now think of the various subplots on this show as the singing sisters from SNL's Lawrence Welk Show sketch.  And the adoption subplot is Kristin Wiig's scary inbred with the baby hands.

"I wish I was that food going down your food tube!"

I'm having increasing problems getting beyond the absurdly firing-worthy behavior that goes unpunished in this workplace.  In the real world, if Dwight announced to the entire office, more or less, "here's the people Andy thought were useless and who get to go to Florida" because he didn't get the staff he wanted,…

On grumpiness:  Sisko is grumpy as a hobby; Odo is grumpy as a career.

That's unpossible.  I mean… it's Dawes!

There's gotta be something awry in my skull when my least favorite storyline is the one I want to discuss…. but do you REALLY think Juliajoel will wind up with the baby?  I think that they are almost certainly NOT going to get the baby, for the simple fact that it's more dramatically efficient for the writers if they…

So you're a soulful black male singer with good vocal talents… and you're getting a big break on national TV…. and the song you pick to sing is….

Who will get custody of Stella?

I'd be the primary tenant in her commercial development.

I'm in for the sock puppet version.

This sounds about a zillion times more interesting that the mooted Office Schrute spinoff.  And it really doesn't sound that interesting. (I have no doubt that MK will find a way to MAKE it interesting — it's just kind of a blah concept.)

Terrifies me….

Sweet jebus, do I love me the Jenny Agutter.  To this day I can't concentrate on anything in that Logan-gettin'-him-some-sweet-internet-tail party scene other than "SHE'S BASICALLY WEARING A SEE-THROUGH SHEET AND NOTHING ELSE!!!!!!!"