Alright, well, you’re not even really reading or responding to my comments, just hurling snarky, sarcastic insults, so I don’t really know what to tell ya. I can tell you think you’re responding to some uber-Nintendo fanboy desperate to defend the game but that’s just not what’s happening here; I’m just giving my…

Except those games didn’t come out this year, and aren’t being claimed to have the “competitor” be better than them. If you want an apt comparison: Metroid: Samus Returns is the best Hollow-Knight-vania of 2017.

Im trans and interested in this game but... Metroid is one of my favorite series ever. I’m sorry but this is not a metroidvania, not even with a grain of salt. Perhaps you could say it has metroidvania elements? I wouldn’t know since this is the first I’ve heard of it but metroidvania by definition is side-scrolling.

I mean... other commenters have pointed this out already, but this game really sounds more Zelda-like instead of Metroid-like. To call it the “Best Metroidvania of the year” sounds less like an attack on Dread and more like a simple misunderstanding on the part of the author.

There’s a way to post about this game that you personally love without resorting to a ridiculous clickbait title intended to garner reaction.

I appreciate this as a good bit of writing. But with respect:

Guys, Kotaku has a really weird vendetta against Metroid Dread. 

Velveeta Shells & Cheese >>>>>>>>>>>>>> Kraft Macaroni & Cheese

One secret weapon for our more femme-presenting folks is a good pair of fleece-lined tights.

Don’t limit your audience like that ^^
I’m a man presenting mandude and I wear those under heavyass carhartt workpants when I go camp in my forest in the winter :D
Like, one of my hobby is the biggest manly man cliché I can…

If I were trying to make an actual point I would probably look at polling on concrete policies and issues. “Capitalism” and “socialism” have real meanings, but for a lot of people it boils down to “Capitalism is when you work for a living, socialism is government handouts.” It’s not a useful question to ask.

“Metroid Dread developer Mercury Steam”

Don’t take me as an apologist for this, but that has nothing to do with Nintendo, but with MercurySteam.

I saw some people this morning guiltily admitting that they hadn’t liked Hatchet when they read it in school. For me it was the exact opposite; I loved reading but most of what was assigned in middle school I just rolled through without much reaction; I was reading ahead of grade level and the stuff I had to write…

Unfortunately, this isn't true. Companies use credits as motivation to stay until the end of a project. Omission is pretty much always deliberate.

U N I O N I Z E

Oooook, but it literally has nothing to do with Untitled Goose Game. And everything to do with a subreddit joke when Hawkmoon was added into the game in Season of the Hunt. Someone joked they wanted a goose-themed ornament for it making the Honkmoon pun, then someone else created a cursed-looking mockup of it which…

Oh Sam Barsanti, you clickbaiting troll.  Warlock might not be a top 10 Marvel person, but so help me, he is way ahead of stuff like Eternals and Inhumans.  (I am genuinely shocked that Marvel is going to its fringe/offbrand stuff before it hits its core properly like F4, Warlock, Moon Knight, Namor, etc.)

Adam Warlock is the best character Brian K. Vaughan ever created.

Holy shit. Did you really just attribute Invincible to Brian Vaughan? I know that newswires have been making major factual errors on this site for the last few years, but to me this feels like a depressing new low.