...and here come the comments which both completely prove the point of the article and justify its existence!

+1 This right here is why I love deadspin — people can here can make a joke about this situation that is 1) not completely backward and insulting, and 2) actually funny

Why, Eli Apple is boy prospect, isn’t he?

You know the Ivy League doesn’t do athletic scholarships, right? So perhaps it is you who are the “fucking imbecile” who needs to learn how they work.

Not wanting to doxx mysely I’m not going to post the actual picture, but in my first mug shot, I definitely went with defiant smirk. I’m pretty happy with the decision, as it not only obviously annoyed the overworked dude processing admissions that day (which feels like a great victory when you’re 19), but it has also…

He put his fingers in the peanut butter!

Well...they are in Florida, after all

Yeah, what kind of asshole thinks disrupting bus service would ever do anyting for Black America?!?

Nah, it’s really not.

Always highlight truthers...

Boooooo! Learn how to bunt, asshole. #smallball

What do we want him to do? Well, there’s not raping people, for one. Failing that, he could apologize. Failing that, he could stop acting like people being mad at him for being a rapist is somehow unfair to him. In short, he could just not act like a human shit stain, and that would be a good start.

But...but...Bernie doesn’t have any support among Black people!!!!! Black people all love Hilary!!!!!!!!

Those are crabs.

I love how he takes the trot after hitting it. That man is not letting the fact that he just hit one out of an MLB park go to waste, which is exactly what you should do.

Wow, a major Clinton supporter doesn’t think highly of Bernie supporters! What a breakthrough!!

Or you don’t want to be complicit in a white-washing session designed to make it look as if the President is doing something so that he doesn’t actually have to address the issue at hand. Why, it’s almost as if some people can understand nuance!

Possibly the best Family Guy joke ever (only Family Guy joke ever?) was when Peter is savagely beating Jimmy Fallon while shouting “Why do you keep giggling and looking directly at the camera? Is it because Mary Tyler Moore did it? YOU HAVEN’T EARNED WHAT SHE HAS!”

Wait, hating Fallon is an unpopular opinion?!? What universe is this?!?

Exactly. Margaret Thatcher was a woman, look how that worked out. Not exactly a feminist victory...