Fuck this woman. Fuck fuck fuck this woman.

Cant believe prince harry is marrying an eighty year old british detective lady … ohhh miss Markle, never mind.

Daaawww so sweet! My girl turns 10 next weekend. We haven’t planned anything yet. She has a love/hate relationship with the pool. Or maybe a tolerate/hate relationship. She seems to like floating around on this float we got just for her, as long as my husband is near by and as long as she doesn’t get too wet. It’s…

What on earth could she want? I don’t get it.

My floofies, trying to look all innocent when I come in to see what’s causing all the banging and rattling in the bathtub.

My Gus with fren. 💙

Joined ninja specially to comment on this after long-time lurking:

I’m only a paragraph or two in, but I’m so stealing ‘a finely curated man’

If we’re trolling the Essie Davis filmography for gay icons, I’d think Miss Phryne Fisher with her lesbian best friend and frequent pro-gay situations would be more obvious -and more fabulous - but I liked The Babadook, too.

Raise a glass to freeeedom

The correction is a joke. A play on Poirot having to correct someone that he is from Belgium and not France, usually someone expressing a prejudice against the French.

I live in Belgium...When I see another mass shooting in the US I’m grateful I live here, where ill intended people have a hard time getting their hands on guns. I live in a city where I can walk the streets without any risk of dying by a random stray bullet. If I lived in the US, I would look over my shoulder more…

No, worries, mademoiselle, the oldest hipster in Brooklyn is on the case.

He always looks like in a back room his family being held hostage and if he doesn’t convince the press to agree with his boss his youngest child is going to take the first bullet. Just sweaty and shifty and way too desperate.

Dear Rest of the Planet and It’s Leaders,

Jenna: “Once Trump got elected, I was like, I’m going to be here—and comments I got from other people in my life that voted for him, like ‘I don’t understand why you’re even going, it’s not like you can change the presidency.’ And I was like, okay, thank you, because now I know for sure that I’m going.”

I think my favorite moment during the march was listening to the man behind me very matter of factly explaining to his 7- or 8-year-old son that they were marching because a lot of people discriminate against women just because they’re women and one of those people is our new president and it’s important to speak out…

I’m so happy people I managed to find tickets to Hamilton in London! And for a decent price. Still in abit of a daze. Happy Birthday Lin-Manuel!

I don’t know anything about the dude you’re talking about, but every vegan on earth has heard the “LOL oral sex isn’t vegan!” taunt a million times before. For those of us who are women, we generally get an even more annoying variation along the lines of “Damn, you’re vegan? I was sure I was going to get you to do…

Trick question. It’s not food, it’s medical waste.