Old people are seriously the worst. I 100% mean yours - whoever is reading this post. Your grams, memaw, pops, popo, pepaw, grannie, grandpap, whatever is the worst.

Russell Brand Approves this message.

Yes, two people who don't know him besides watching him on the tv play a game are arguing over whether or not he'll commit a specific crime. Leave the future crime to Tom Cruise.

I hope this turns into a shitstorm large enough to swamp Sepp Blatter's boat. Corrupt as they come.

Women telling men how to be a man is what's wrong in the first place. It's every bit as asinine as me trying to tell you how to be a woman.

I haven't heard any new stuff but Killing Them Softly was great. Can't take that away from him even if he has gotten soft and unfunny.

Don't you know? You aren't allowed to reference any of the Chapelle Show episodes. Poor little Davy gets really upset.

Please reread and correct your post's capitalization for next class period. F.

You Canadians and your jingoism...

Sounds like it's road rage gone RIGHT. Neither of these morons deserve to live in a society.

These are, down to the last option, garbage.

As a proud owner of a 3 month old, I can say I have never drank more in my life. (and this after giving up the devils sauce for the pregnancy as an act of solidarity.)

Well its a prequel so the story doesn't exactly continue.

Schooled on journalism by a university spokesmen, another proud Deadspin moment.

For real though, Sonic is who needs to do this. They hand you all eight items spinning on tops, unwrapped; no organizational container whatsoever like: "Good luck motherfucker"

Nice graphic, I liked the Hitchhikers movie adaption as well.

This screams fixed to me. I understand not wanting to give up a penalty but Shaktr had all the defensive intensity of a NBA all-star game.

So when forced to play non-stop, football players react the exact same way as soccer players. I now leave all of you to your sputtering denials.

Brock is about to have TWO dicks on his chest.

-Photoshop drawing by Michael J. Fox.