I've done this before. Rounded the keeper in my first club game, had time to think: "Now I'm going to show my new teammates who's boss" and.......shank. Tony Danza remained unchallenged.

NASL predates MLS, fyi

1. Go into a dressing room with some options.

Yo, Jalopnik is that way —->

yes that's exactly what I'm saying. people unable to manage one of the simplest tasks on the planet, dressing oneself is amazing to me. You claiming (through tears I imagine) that I know nothing about it; like its some sort of complex task or deep thought is very dramatic.

Damn. One of those games were you think back on how you wasted your day attending to your family and working and think: I should have ignored all that shit.

Its underwear, not war or civil rights. Don't be over dramatic.

I am a being who knows what size underwear to buy.

It's amazing to me that women can't buy the proper sized underwear.

Hopefully they have the real Maradona snort first, the imposter can't handle that much cocaine.

Not surprising. Here is a gem from one of my trips, it was on top of the Great Wall and warned us:

Eagles? Peak white trashness anyway.

The 50 year old white man who writes both of their music is laughing his way to the bank. Do not look behind the curtain, you will not see either one of these "artists" writing shit.

Except that part where wrestling is a misogynistic, fake, childish pastime for hillybillys.

Why isn't trying to rebroadcast their PPV's for free on here?

You're an excellent judge of character.

I'm offended by the combination of the "Keep Calm" motif with a massively overused font: Trajan Pro.

-1

I find your use of "dick" to be offensive. Being snarky about another female's weight? Clearly she's being a bitch. Leave us males out of this age old female snipefest.

Intern not at Sports center: "Oh cool, this posterize feature makes it look hand drawn, it totally looks like I commissioned an oil painting!"