"Hold up, I'm gettin my pussy did."

I wouldn't call them vaginal decals. They're more like… pubic mound décor.

But on the other hand, it's nice to have foreknowledge of which side is going to taste like cumin.

Welcome to Jamaica, have a nice day.

Growing up in the late 80's did something exceptionally strange to us, didn't it?

When you find that one, please kindly mail it to my first boyfriend. Thanks.

I plan on Snoutjazzling my dog's nose with the first one.

Yeah I was picturing old school Red Hot Chili Peppers sock wearing.

You and I must have listened to too much Red Hot Chili Peppers in our youth.

Yes, worn strategically.

Same! You were expecting white Hanes dad socks, I presume?

For that dress? Yes. Fired.

She looks itchy and very uncomfortable in that dress.

I read "co-op wedding dress". As in, a wedding dress five people go in on and each wear to their weddings. Am totally for it, makes financial sense!!

Still classier than the see-through corset tops with visible boning. *shudder*

I don't force my kids to hug or kiss even me. I ask for a hug or kiss, and if they say "Not now" or "I don't want to", that is ok. But that is mostly because I want to teach them to ask other kids if they want a hug before hugging them, not because I am worried it will lead to sexual victimization. I just want them to…

If I see one more bride yanking at the top of her dress all night, I'll scream, myself.

Can't be much worse than strapless....

We really are our own worst critics.

I can relate. I never let any of my previous boyfriends see me truly naked because of my lopsided boobs. I had a lot of little tricks, even during sex, to keep myself covered up. Honestly, I kept up the charade until I had my first baby. I figure that once someone watches you give birth to a baby, they've pretty much…