Anyone who thinks child-rearing isn't occasionally soul-crushing probably hasn't had children.

People who pay for "arisinal" ice cubes are the same kind of assholes who, in 2001, visited Oxygen Bar in San Francisco, so they could pay to breathe different kinds of air. http://www.sfweekly.com/sanfrancisco/b…

No! That can't be true! God, that's amazing. Bless her. People who give their kids silly names are my favourite. Nothing brings friends closer together than mutual fits of silent giggles over the name choices of others.

Been lurking for years and this, this comment is the one that inspired me to comment back. Not with anything profound or witty. Just with a thanks. Best thing I've read today. You made me cry, the good kind of cry. So seriously, thanks.

i wanna flip like 500 tables about that last one. WOW THO.

I'm sorry but am I reading this correctly? A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL advised her that milk would come out OF HER ARMPITS??!! This issue has now jumped the shark and I think we can all go home because we're clearly done here.

Happily, mojo isn't a thing!

That is my method.

I thought I was the only one who did this...

Imagine someone wants to bring a bowl of M&M's into your workplace. 10% of those M&M's are toxic and give people the runs so badly they pee on the floor.

You don't aim as well as you think you can.

WHO IS STANDING UP TO WIPE? 30%? DO YOU FEEL CLEAN EVER?

I noted this in my comment too, but this is not TMI. It's just the right amount of "I" for the comment section of this post.

Excuse me, WHAT?

Bearing down on a poo means you're also bearing down on the tampon, meaning for some people the tampon will start to get pushed out, too. We can't isolate our rectal muscles from the rest of our lower abdominals.

I often have to as mine is like "lol are we all leaving??"

I also want to find the 28% of respondents that hover. No ladies, you cannot accurately piss and hover, especially if you are in heels. Target sells toilet seat covers for $1/10 covers if you are that toilet-phobic.

Pretty much anyone who gives a one star review for a shipping problem unrelated to the quality of the product.

There was only one set of footprints in the sand Adultoscare. You carried me the whole time.

He sounds more like his character in Alfie. o_0