She does! A blonde Kelly Kapowski. :D

Ah, Made of Glass DiPietro. Everyone predicted he'd be this great future goalie, and he sort of turned into the Lindros of goaltenders. That's something, I guess.

"Also, Amanda Seyfried has enormous eyeballs"

Oh yeah, that's why they taste so freaking good. It's all that lovely beef flavor. I try really hard to avoid McDonalds fries now, but once in a while I'll still cave.

There are also healthy fast food joints, at least in LA. We have a bunch of delis, salad bars and wrap places that make healthy meal options and are definitely not sit down cafes. So it's still fast food and probably not as good as something homecooked, but definitely not terrible for you either.

You were a much better Barbie caretaker than I was! I always wanted my Barbies to be perfectly dressed the first time around so I wouldn't have to change their clothes.

Mmm McD french fries. I rarely go to any burger chains anymore - being vegetarian limits my options - but every so often, the craving for McD fries still makes me want to go and devour a super sized box.

Yep, becoming vegetarian severely limited my fast food options. Some limp lettuce and sad dry tomato slices do not make a salad.

I still have a cherished photo of 5-year-old me at the zoo in a pink TMNT t-shirt. I guess it was a compromise my mom made: "girl" color but "boy" cartoon.

Oh god porcelain dolls freak me out. (So do the dolls that open and close their eyes because AHHH.) I never, ever wanted one in the house, and luckily my parents never got me any.

I wasn't a Lego fan as a kid because I hated having to build things. I wanted my toys ready to play. (Yeah, I was kind of lazy.) Although I do admit I loved destroying Lego creations.

Mahogany brown shoes might have been okay. But the tan leather? No.

If this had read Hulk Mode - that would have been awesome.

Right? People who wear pink just get chalk everywhere!

I like my running shoes to be black because I run outdoors and prefer dirt stains not to show up so quickly on my shoes. But apparently shoe designers do not think of this.

Uggggggghhhh I hate that all the "ladies" gear is always pink. Like WTF I want to wear something that fits me but also is IN MY TEAM'S COLORS how is that hard to understand? Usually I just end up buying the "regular" jerseys and dealing with it or getting the largest possible size in youth.

What I want to know is, why does he feel the need to point out women wearing pink workout gear? Does wearing one color magically make you stronger? Men would never wear pink (mostly because uh, companies don't make pink workout clothes for men) which means...they are more serious about lifting?

Woman 1: Bitch you did not just buy the exact same yoga mat as me.

Oh no, I wear pink when I exercise, it must mean I am not serious about my fitness. Oops.

I don't know, my parents did this and the few times I complained about other kids getting to eat sugary treats all the time, I was just told "yeah and those kids are going to get fat and all their teeth will fall out" and...it worked for me. Plus, treats always seemed to taste better when I only got them on special…