Well Actually Guy: “Well, actually, Harden has the Rockets in 3rd place, and” *is beaten to death*

He named the two horses Rougned Odor and Rougned Odor.

It looks like Candy Land jizzed an S.

Profar appealed to the second base umpire but he didn’t have Jurickdiction.

but he smiled when he played baseball

So, fuck this guy then. He got all the love when he died, but he would clearly have been guilty of manslaughter had he lived. He killed two people.

+1 -1 +1

BREAKING: Democrats are more pessimistic about Republican led administration than Republicans.

I’m sorry, but the speech was pretty hokey. If Emma Stone made that same speech we’d call her just another self-involved, pretentious actor.

She’s amazing. MOST of her speech was amazing, but...

What a save!

Rest in Pizza-Pizza

S.T.A.B. - Smile To make it All Better

Is this the movie poster for Rocky IV Loko?

I legitimately enjoy watching Tony Romo play, so I am hoping he goes to a team that actually has decent players and a legitimate shot at the playoffs. Want to see him do well.

Deadspin definitely didn’t get owned by Ted goddamn Cruz.

When I put a can of Hamm’s, a rusted 20lb dumbbell, 16 bags of beef jerky (plain), and a pair of sturdy cargo shorts I bought on sale at Kohl’s into a 1992 Ford Ranger with 210k miles on it and parked that thing in the blazing hot sun I never knew the child I created in that hot fusion cell would be born as a fully…

Late last year I was sitting at a bar in the Jacksonville airport. An old man sat down on the stool next to me, and proclaimed/asked, “I don’t drink, can I get a diet coke?” I was down a few large beers at the time and gave into him wanting to strike up a conversation. ESPN was on TV, and he kept interjecting with…

Less go shake der hans