My mother has a lot of mental health issues (bipolar depression and borderline personality disorder) and she doesn't process guilt at all well. So she denies things so aggressively and persistently that you start to wonder if they ever really happened. I am (mostly) estranged from her because she was emotionally…

I think sometimes abusive parents have a tendency to believe the lies they've told themselves about how wonderful their children's childhoods were. Particularly if their children turned out to be decent adults.

I am calling it now: this is the story that gets the most whiny comments written about it. Just watch.

We don't coordinate our Girls ass-eating coverage with any other site.

"She is that friend who you love going out with, but know there's a 50/50 chance she'll end the night crying on the street, shoeless, so you sort of just have to take the chance."

If you are trying to pretend that you're still the young buck when you're my age, it just doesn't work.

They are mad because he went away on Christmas too. " GWB NEVER WENT AWAY ON CHRISTMAS" whatever people! I would be so totally eating shaved ice in Hawaii in December if I had an excuse, and has being $2.35/ gallon is a great one.

look for the ones who're almost choking on their own spit trying to roll the 'r' in croissant

Quick question, is "Baby Laugh a Lot" in my basement right now quietly giggling as she tries to rock slowly up the stairs brandishing a straight razor that is no doubt meant for my Achilles tendon? I mean that's crazy right? RIGHT?

"Well, maybe I will come to your country then. And eat all of your bread!"

When one of the guys tried to stop her, she pulled his beanie off his head and used it to wipe herself.

LOOK AT ME I'M CONTROVERSIAL!!!


I HAVE EVEN HAVE FAKE PENIS'S AND SEMI LEGAL DRUGS ITS CARRRRAAAAZYYYYYY

I am happy for her and her freedom and colors and weed, but this is honestly exhausting to look at. Seriously, my body is crashing and my brain feels drained of serotonin just looking at these photos. Aw fuck, I am too old for this, aren't I?

Wes is totes getting an A in her class. That reveal of her sitting behind the desk scared the shite out of me.

Ultimately it just turned out to be the result of a really bad promotional campaign by U2 and Apple.

She was implying the entire time that she thought the women were full of shit too. I know she didn't come out and say that directly, but she was totally implying "crazy bitches be accusing famous people cuz they're famous!!!" Really? With the sheer volume of accusers?

Whoppi has accumulated a suspicious number of pro-rapist positions. She is starting to look really gross.

Patricia Arquette is my new hero. Best takedown of a pap ever. And she's right. I need to add that to the list of things to teach my daughter. Tell men who are following and harassing you to fuck off. Loudly.

Penn Holderness, the smarmy dad here, works in video production, internet marketing and social media management. He is rather openly using these phony "family hijinks" viral videos to market his business. It's not that he's some sad sack dad trying to become a viral star; he's a blow-dryed former local TV man turned…