It’s time somebody spoke to him about how stupid this is.

Geesh, how fast does it go through pads/rotors?

What do you want to know about it?

Why, just dear lord why???? 

Is that enormous badge large enough to fill the void in my soul?

I think you may have solved all those cold-case Festiva murders from the early 90's. This creep was hacking them up, storing the parts in his warehouse, and performing weird Frankenstein experiments with them. It’s always the ones you most suspect.

Time to buy some cheap Smart Cars and start up a soccer league!

Car2Go Is Trying Not To Be A Failed Experiment

annnnnd it already broke down, literally on the way home for the guy who bought it

Good.

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They parked it in the spectator parking lot, but it was definitely at SEMA, I swear.

I hope that’s the last time I ever type “2017 Hyundai Tucson” into Google.

Sweet ass decal sold me. Just think how cool my kid’s friends will think I am! 

I thought that last one was a dolly. This does get confusing, doesn’t it? The funny thing is that we’re all discussing the same language. 

These are referred to as “hand-trucks” sometimes, so yes, it is a truck.

Yep. Also (related), truck:

And so we aren’t confused, this is a Tuk Tuk.

So a suburban is a van. Ha! That’s going to piss someone off.

I have no dog in this fight. The Silverado is hideous. I should’ve made my statement general to most pickup buyers.