I didn’t know I was dying for a remake until I just heard it.

For a song about butts I thought I see some butts. If you know what I mean? It’s 2017 and women are out there doing squats like all the time.

This prick used her as a sponge for his frustrations in life. Setting her up to fail and then beating her when she did.

Honestly, I think this guy might be my least favorite person on the WH staff. He’s like Steve Bannon, but if Bannon were a 14-year-old boy high on Adderall and misplaced arrogance. In fact, I’m starting to suspect that he’s some kind of evil clone child, a la Mini-Me from Austin Powers.

You missed a boner.

These details keep leaking out like...

Something about A-Rod gives me mad “RUN LADY, DO NOT TRUST ME” vibes. Damn J-Lo, back at it again with the terrible taste in men.

Oh how far we have fallen.

“My mother would have loved you.”

remember when America had classy leaders? oy vey.

We used to have it all, rolling in the deep...

Dude is a low life, so no surprise he’s in the sock game. The sock game is one of the most brutal industries, right up there with the drug game. A single misstep could have you wearing a toe tag.

Yeah that’s due to the spine removal procedure everyone must undergo to appear on Fox News.

copy editor: better make sure this is right

Like, good for them and all, but I’m just saying that, personally, I’d like to be mourned for more than a couple few months kthx.

Nope, too soon. It’s none of my business and I’m glad they’re all happy but all the hair stands on the back of my neck when this happens

The headline makes this sound a lot more ominous than it was.

“He did not get any sun,” Murray added. “He had a baseball hat on.”