If you have grease and oil buildup in your toilet drain, you might want to see a doctor, or at the very least change your diet... ;-P

I've been married to the same woman for 37 years. What is this dates of which you speak?

At least you have a built in response
Much appreciated
Very thoughtful
So nice
Wow

No, that hat is awesome. Maybe not for everyone - but still awesome.

This. People who don't have kids on one don't get it. They think it's ok if little johhny misses his nap. They think we are crazy for keeping on a strict schedule. They are wrong.

Don't be. They have a tendency to do the most amazing things at just the right times to make you completely forget you haven't had a good nights sleep in months.

Used Board Games

Hey... I think you're fat AND stupid!

Disagree. They definitely aren't $1 and they taste like butter cookies with sugar crystals (on some of them... aka the best ones shaped like pretzels).

Empty creme brûlée cups that used to contain store bought creme brûlée.

Any album where it's really your taste and not the recipient's

Any Sort of Cleaning Implement/Supply

Cost $1.00? These things are expensive as fuck, as far as cookies are concerned. AND I LOVE THEM!!!

My Annoying Sister in Law gets me this kind of crap every year.

A Casket...

PETS

Self Help Books

Generic Toiletry Gift Baskets from Bath Stores

Cars

Just the thing to go with my macrame plant hangers!