For Gawker, I’ve been in ‘teh greyz’ since Kinja 2.0 and I was never in the black ever in Jezzie. I survive on the strength of my comments getting promoted. :-)

As an old, huge shlong, could someone please explain to me the appeal of the neck tattoo?

my mother’s belly was taut a month after she gave birth, even after her fourth kid.

We can duck and cover in the corner together. I thought the pregnancy pics were a bit over the top but this is beyond.

These photos are embarrassing, get over yourself.

I’m sweet and kind until we negotiate a scene and establish a safeword.

At work: “Sue” was going through a scare - spots showing on her lungs, etc. “Mary” said to Sue “you’re toast”. To this day Sue and I will laugh like fools over this woman.

People say the most awful things to people with cancer. Well, they say the most awful things all the time to everyone, but you really notice it when you’re covered in scabs from chemo injections. A friend of mine looked me deeply in the eyes and asked, “What have you done to bring this into your life?” I told her I…

I can’t see Robert Shapiro’s name now without thinking of John Travolta and hearing David Schwimmer call him “Bobby” :-)

Kim doesn’t even drink. I don’t think she’s snorting coke of a table in her home in the broad daylight.

As a recovered alcoholic I can say please get medical help if you stop drinking. I had to be hospitalized three days before going to rehab to prevent this. Don’t be ashamed, and don’t think you can automatically do it on your own.

Somebody who has a criminal record and whose only obvious redeeming quality is his looks?

What even is this.

Finally, I can admit it.

This shaaaaaade is pretty good though

I don’t know how to feel about this. The dog did bite her and her partner repeatedly. And shelters lie about dogs’ histories all the time in order to get them adopted. I’m not saying Dunham didn’t do anything wrong, but I’m not prepared to blast her for it. If the dog had issues that she couldn’t deal with (after…

From baby buttholes to tofurkey sausages, this whole article made me vaguely nauseated.

Seriously. Have considered keeping a spare mum on backup.

Thank you. I came here to say this. People keep asking for stories about real people that are inclusive. THIS IS A FUCKING REAL STORY THAT IS INCLUSIVE. SO REAL IN FACT THAT IT FUCKING HAPPENED. Unless white women now have to either date within their race or no one is allowed to tell true stories about interracial…

Or be actually honest: Student. Fucking. Loans.

Why can I get a used car loan at 2.4% but there is just ZERO WAY to change the interest rate on my student loans from what they are? (6%). Why can’t I change this percentage to 4%? 3%? Why is it set in fucking stone?

I’m not having kids when I’m paying $500 a…