I cannot fucking wait to go to a bar and then leave after one drink because I’ll have more fun hanging out at home with my dog.

Relevant:

My own experience with Piano Man at karaoke bars does not support this hypothesis. The key is not pull it out too early in the evening. You gotta wait until everyone’s really shithoused.

How long has this dude been making dupes impersonating you? Like, if it weren’t the saddest thing imaginable I’d almost be impressed by the persistence.

Possibly my favorite Walken impression is Jake Gyllenhaal on the DVD commentary for Donnie Darko, just because it comes out of absolutely nowhere and is completely ridiculous. “Hey, I’m Frank, I’m a bunny...My eye...it’s shot out!”

Yeah, there’s any number of films that could fit the bill but whenever somebody mentions Walken, I immediately think of that scene. Followed closely by the Sicilian scene in True Romance. 

They’re gonna lose pizza and avocado toast gets the headline? Weird.

He’s deservedly caught shit for his trans jokes, which at minimum are lazy garbage. It’s material more suited to hacky open mic performers than one of the greatest stand-ups of all time. Especially because as anyone who watched 8:46 could tell you, he’s clearly still got his fastball.

Matt Berry as Batman with Harry Peacock as The Riddler is now something I want to see.

I was 12 when Austin Powers 2 and Bowfinger came out. In retrospect, it was inevitable that she would be my first celebrity crush. I doubt I was thinking much about it at that time, but she’s also quite an underrated actress.

Funny, I was thinking the same about the lack of Dawes.

100%. The entire back half of the season was just unmitigated brilliance and any of those episodes could have appeared here with no quarrel from me.

That question will be answered this Sunday night at WWE SUUUUUUUUUUUPER SLAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM

1. Peanut butter blossom

I mean, he’s a pretty smart guy. He graduated from one of Canada’s top business schools with really good grades!

pecan pie rugelach

To piggyback, Kenji has a book coming out next year that’s all about wok cooking, and he’s mentioned wok hei a bunch in his POV YouTube vids.

Put the bunny back in the box.

I’ll always resent polio for not finishing Mitch McConnell off when it had the chance.

Baby Nut brought us this plague and you’ll never convince me otherwise