OH MY GOD. You just connected the dots. Tomato Man= Donald Trump= Tomato Face.

October Surprise Anal is my new band name.

That is a REALLY good point. If these nimrods are mixing up their vaginas and their assholes all the time, there would be a whole lot of tampons up the butt. Yet, you never hear “whoopsey me, just plugged my anus with Tampax, ha ha!”

Granted, I don’t personally know Kimmy, but she always seems to have a good sense of business and money. She went from selling her famous friends’ old clothes on eBay to being a multimillionaire. She might have 99 problems, but her bank account ain’t one.

Not necessarily. I am an ex-Nordstrom employee, and let me tell you- that shit happened on a pretty regular basis. Most of the time, the clerks knew it was a fake and sent the scammer on his or her way. But if you are desperate for commission, you will take back a shitty Rainbow suit with Dolce and Gabbana tags so the…

Me too. His behavior this week calls to mind Britney’s episode with the head shaving and the 5150 hold. No snark- I genuinely wish him the best. I don’t know the guy, but he has 2 small children and a wife who love him dearly. He was able to come back after a near-fatal car accident, I think he can come back from…

I fell down the rabbit hole on this one and I think you might be onto something. She seems to truly believe that she is a goddess who manifested Trump into Presidency. Like, only her. Yes she is a terrible no-good racist POS, but she certainly appears to have legit mental health problems.

Me too! I feel really strange if I don’t have them on. They are oddly comforting to me. Although the brand Spanx is garbage.

Stars- they really are just like us.

Poor Chris Christie. I hope he gets a disguise and goes to the show. You know he doesn’t want to miss this.

God yes. I could care less if you are vegan. Fuck, eat 51 bananas a day if that’s your thing. I have plenty of normal vegan friends, but I have no time for the ones who are all “you are a mass murderer because you eat cheese”. Seriously, vegans- no one cares what you eat.

The show’s producers made a great move by having Beyoncé perform, IMHO. “Daddy Lessons” is by far the best country song I have heard in ages and sorry, haters- it doesn’t get more classic country than singing about Texas and how your daddy taught you how to shoot a gun. And she did not overshadow the show. Hello,…

Illuminati.

Seriously? Baby Pope and FLOTUS in Chuck Taylors. The Obamas are the coolest.

I’ve never wanted kids, and never felt any pressure to have them. My parents passed while I was a (fairly) young adult, and I didn’t have any additional family to nag me. I take it as a compliment if my coworkers ask if I want kids. I’m 43-that ship sailed long ago.

Haha! I have encountered toilets that you had to press the lever on for what seemed like years, but only on the train did I encounter something like you speak of. I just claimed it wasn’t me and moved on- obv not something that would have worked in your situation.

Maybe I am just a cynic, but I don’t think it is happening that often. Usually if a toilet isn’t working, the damn thing will run over, not just stop pulling the poo through. If the toilet is broken, your date is a colossal asshole for not telling you. Lastly, why are you using a 2nd floor restroom? If you are in the…

He probably sent Hill 30,000 dick pics. I’d delete them too, girl.

I bet he is masturbating furiously to that headline. Right. Now. “Yeah, baby, I’m 5 feet 10 inches of big cock.” Blech!

I agree! I think it’s cute and fun. And he isn’t wrong- I have no doubt she is always the smartest person in the room. Celebs are people too, and they have a right to express their presidential choices just like anyone else.