Not in my state. It’s illegal to be on the phone and drive. Yes, he was holding his phone up to his ear.

I don’t put up with people on their phones and driving when I’m in the car. I even snapped at my Uber driver a couple of weeks ago because he kept taking calls while driving me to the airport.

I was hoping for facehuggering

My first guess was that they just watched Alien for the first time.

There’s always twitter https://twitter.com/SenToomey

Trump has probably retired to his room now to watch the Miss Universe show and jerk off.

In other news, Price has job offers to be the social media coordinator for both Chris Brown and Floyd Mayweather.

“I’m white like Brady, do you think Goodell cares?”

“I respect black men so much, I make them move to places that are more affordable. That is the new Affordable Care Act.”

I knew I was missing something!

AB would live stream that and I would watch that man smile all day.

The Blood God would be pleased.

Trump: “I met a black man today. He was the very best black man. His Father was one of the best black men to ever be alive besides me.”

Oberyn Martel is all confused now.

Call Liberator Medical. I’m serious. I just found the best catheter for me.

Unsurprisingly no. This one was not Cartman’s fault. It was two rogue trainers fucking with Kyle, who did it for the lulz.

lol this is just a meme waiting

Mayweather would have to spell his name first on the contract.

Why does flying cause people to forget how to behave in public?