If you crate train the kid well enough, then you’ll only need someone to stop by to let them out once a day while you’re at work for the first few months. After that, they should be ok to be left alone all day without needing to go out!

Why am I even alive today as someone who has chosen not to have kids?

i think the only answer for this is: because women are fucking awesome, kickass, and endure a shitload of bs.

I don’t know, why do men stay alive at all once they have fun in a cup time at the donor center? Shoo.

Sometimes you win and get a tv show, sometimes you get arrested for fraud.

“Malachi-Five”

To be frank, if he’s offering “high-quality Holistic and Alternative Medical care” he’s completely qualified.

A LOT of women got some of dat back in the day.

Please don’t ask me to explain evangelicals. I would have an easier time explaining string theory.

I sent her a nice email:

America is a racist shit hole. Every non American who visits there will tell you this, and every American that travels over seas will tell you this.

Every American who never goes anywhere, or does and stays in hotels and does the tourist game will claim other wise. OTHER PLACES HAVE PROBLEMS TOO!! They scream, they…

I’m surprised she doesn’t refer to it as H-E-DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS.

If hell’s not funny or cool, how come everyone’s always like, “that’s cool as hell,” and “she’s funny as hell”? I don't get it.

If nothing else, Trump has provided a fantastic public service to the rest of us.

I'm white and scared...scared of all these trump supporters.

Send her this article! Tell her you think her husband is great (even if that’s an exaggeration), but that this article made you think of her and you just want to be sure that she’s prepared, not only in the event that her marriage changes, but if her husband became ill or lost his job or god forbid, died. Say you love…

This is hardly a new idea, or an idea that Perhach invented. The original idea is called having Fuck You money (or Screw You money); as in, if your boss micromanages you, you can tell him “fuck you” and go. The best advice is to have at least a year’s worth of expenses saved up for it, in case finding a job proves…

I don’t want to sound like an ass, but I will, for saying this: