Maybe some Vanderbilt kids came and helped.

They did it because of fear of death, fear for their families, and because they have been tortured and brainwashed through horrible conditions to follow the rules. Not saying what they did was right, but just explaining why. The people have been tortured and starved into be “good” little soldiers.

The worst thing nobody tells is that all of the members of the team this soldier was part of are already dead as well as his family. Probably the ones who couldn’t stop him as well were executed.

Or you can leave Indiana and go to Canada, where they have a thriving LGBT scene.

They’ve been streamlining and assure us he’ll be roadkill in 18 months.

God, I haven’t seen such an obvious excuse to go out of one’s way to casual note one’s Ivy League heritage since I was at Yale.

I spent the night blowing chunks in the fraternity house bathroom

Eric Trump put’s menstrual blood on his ass and fights off the attacking male chimps, mostly

Eric Trump was horrified when his pet hamster ate her babies before he had the chance.

...in a locked room that will slowly fill with Zyklon-B.

There will be a pen in the back area in which they can hurl all-caps Thanksgiving quotes from their respective uncles at one another.

Is it true un-promoted commenters can go but not mingle (or make direct eye contact) with Deadspin staff?

This is seriously badass.

Fuck yes. This is courageous.

Yeah, who could ever intuit, on a sports blog, that “(city name) (noun)“ would be referring to a sports franchise. Truly befuddling.

FIFA just announced that in the upcoming United Passions sequel, Tim Roth, who plays Blatter, will be replaced by Kevin Spacey.

I stood next to Hope Solo backstage at a conference earlier this week — can confirm she’s awesome and terrifying

He is fucking lucky to be alive

The bad news is that with our traffic they won’t actually get here until 2021.

Agreed, let’s get blue first then try to swing the thing further left.