John’s voice saying he’s got the vapors is the sunshine of my day now.

I haven’t seen or spoken to my parents in 6 years. Best 6 years of my life.

My husband was exactly like that. Turns out he has autism!

If he’s going to be on his own soon, it’s time to let him do all those things for himself.

What city? I love being a tour guide to new neighbors.

Are you meat eaters? A roast chicken is super easy and always impresses.

I feel you :( The cute two bed/1 bath the next street over that I have been dreaming of just went on the market... for 1.2 million. :( Forever a renter.

I’m so sorry. :( What a beautiful kitty.

I have one that grows out of a mole on my neck. Very witch-like. I have another one that grows so long on my chest, on the right side halfway from neck and shoulder. :(

Ag is 80% of CA water usage, but I am pissed at how often our cemeteries water the dead people. Stop watering the dead people grass.

Having done both- you never win. Strap on your best Fuck You I Do What I Want face!

I stayed home out of guilt first and then out of sheer economic necessity. I can’t afford the daycare cost to go back to work. I miss working and I feel guilty for being the june cleaver mom I never wanted to be. (I love cooking, sewing, even cleaning... but that’s not who I want my kids to see me as and model that to…

Bernie all the way!

I think alpha men are scary as fuck and have zero interest in them. Preach it, brother (or sister but I think brother?)

Give me that dress. I will get married all over again to wear that. I mean... god, it’s just so beautiful!

Reminds me of his speech... He’s got a list that rhymes with bucket!

Oh my god, don’t give them any ideas.

I laughed at Berkeley liberal... I live across the bay and use Berkeley as a descriptor for a level of liberal crunchiness that makes my socialist ass blush.

SUCCESS!

My 3 year old kills me a hundred times a day with questions and observations that just never end. Today it was just chanting in the fabric store the number 69 over and over. Shouldn’t that tiny toddler penis of his make him silent and good at math?!