My dad was my first rapist, so I was aware extremely early that I could be used for someone else’s sexual gratification. When I knew that basically all men would use me that way... I think 11. I was at a party with my parents. My dad was drunk, his friends were drunk, and they demanded to dance with me. It was so…

Nevermind, I googled and I was wrong. Donor egg.

I thought I had read about them having a relationship in the past, too, but I’m still drinking my coffee so I’m not verifying my poor memory yet. I need fuel.

Standing ovation!

I actually think that softer message of GTFO is worse. If you’re going to exclude trans women at least say it like you mean it so we can properly call you out on it. Own your asshole move.

The surrogate is the biological parent I thought? Didn’t they use her eggs?

You do not have to put the father’s name on the birth certificate, even if you know. When my daughter was born (and ex had already left me, refusing to pay child support once the baby was born) I asked the nurse/ administrator if I had to put his name down if I know who he is but he’s a real asshole. She looked…

I thought the tricking part was because he was having a relationship with the surrogate after Shepard divorced him, while surrogate was pregnant.

I would love to see one of those really old, fashionable broads from NY wear this.

My kids have these sheets! It’s hard to find cute patterns that are still gender neutral.

You had me at Lichtenstein pants.

Yeah, that’s exactly what I got out of that. It seems like prosecutors fucked it up intentionally. I’m picturing them saying something like, “I got you, bro.”

I feel pretty close to exploding right now. I don’t even know where to put all this rage.

Tonight I am packing away chocolate filled pastries and Marionberry ice cream. Happy 420!

Hey, I’m a mom. Don’t pin that ugly crap on me! Let’s say grandmas that still want to feel young and give themselves cutesy names to avoid being called grandma.

I didn’t check in the city, but Tanforan was sold out and Target said SSF and Colma are still stocked.

I’m hitting a hypomanic episode (minor, thanks to medication) so in my state I thought OMG yes maybe there’s something I want! I only went online, but I didn’t find a single thing I would buy. I feel like this says a lot about this line. Even in mania, my prime shop for shit you don’t want or need time, I don’t want…

That gift was absolutely wonderful, thoughtful, and useful. When my SIL procreates I think I will borrow your idea. I’m sorry your ex-SIL was a massive cunt.

Our SPCA does birthday parties, and you ask your guests to bring a needed item for the SPCA instead of a present. I swear it was the best birthday party my daughter ever had, and I took home one present that someone just couldn’t help bringing.

I think that’ actually an awesome use of gifts that aren’t needed/wanted.