Missed a chance to say, “who among us can throw the first scone?”

stassa u fancy with your UGHs in your donuts.

Hello, Joe Biden.

He had to hide his gangly deformed finger.

A 9/11 themed wedding...

I really would like to think those are actually his.

I’m fairly large in the chestal area, and it’s Would You Take A Look At That when I have a push up bra on.

I’m gonna go with $21.96, Bob.

AT FIRST GLANCE I THOUGHT IT WAS GWEN STEFANI.

Rita Ora had $4500???

In honor of Kylie’s new hair, here’s my favorite blonde joke:

“I’ve gotten all my sisters on it and all my friends.”

I know which one I’d attend

Where are you from

ETA-No for real tho, I think she was just mad trolling them. That is some dry ass sense of humor there. My hat is off to her and her ability to keep a strait face.

Right like when people ask me where I’m from I just say the state I live in. It upsets them very much.

Oh cum all ye faithful.

So it’s sort of the opposite of why most churches have to close.

*blearily stares at screen*

It also claims that her clerks were “coerced by the threat of contempt sanctions” into granting marriage licenses.