Off topic, but that banner pic...

g-string yoga is absolutely not my jam but i respect it

Paul Bettany was in that tennis movie, Wimbledon, that I will watch whenever it comes on television. He's also married to Jennifer Connelly.

Gwyneth, texting your assistant to tell them to pick you up some red lingerie made from organic cotton hand-spun by yoga masters and sold in an exclusive Manhattan boutique for $5799 does not qualify as "sexing".

I don't understand this one. It's just a John Boehner selfie on Instagram. How is that shade?

I was praying to Cthulhu for that White House Instagram would make Shade Court. Kara, you never disappoint.

I knew all the words! For my 8th grade American history class, we had to write a encyclopedic paragraph for every single thing in the song. A full decade before Wikipedia. I procrastinated until the day before and failed the project. Because it was a full decade before Wikipedia.

youre a bitch. i bet some poor, nice fucking girls in axo are freaking the fuck out during their FIRST WEEK OF CLASSES because your article now reigned hell on their sorority. i bet theyre having to deal with their nationals and will be getting shit on as a chapter for the next two fucking years. honestly fuck you.

Are you sure it wasn't Kappa Kappa Kappa?

Let me guess: laws against unrelated women living together to prevent brothels?

She is quite unfashionably voluptuous.

Best. Boyfriend. Ever.

I kept reading polish week as Polish week, in which case I imagine the prep is less manicure and more:

john oliver can get it.

Jessica Williams is a treasure, and I hope she'll continue to be on The Daily Show for many, many years to come.

You can really tell he puts have a week to prepare the show to use. The research they do is pretty incredible.

SO glad to get in from the beginning on this show. I hope they expand it to a full hour soon.

Sorry Jon Stewart, but the student has become the master. John Oliver and his writers are FUCKING BRILLIANT!

Oh yeah, baby!

I have gotten in serious trouble with my people over the fact that I am completely in love with John Oliver and I prefer him to Jon Stewart. People are trying to disown me and are re-writing their wills over this. I'm cool with that, because JOHN OLIVER. What's not to love? Dimples. Glasses. Floppy hair.…