Oh God, that is terrible! You poor thing. Can't you just use the remote? John Elway can't be on every channel, can he?

"Those poor kids are fucking doomed to a life of passive-aggressive disappointment and bitter alcoholism."

Or Suzy Kolber who gets her sideline kisses from drunk uncles

Genetalia is a dirty word these days?

Can't wait for "Johnny Unemployed."

... 4 of the 5 pictured in these shots are WOMEN...

Must have taken some effort to dunk over his mom. Can't believe the dude is barely taller than her.

Tell me something, Chris. Why are child rape victims fair game? Why is it ok to walk around with hole in your pants to make light of a horrible situation of repeated, prolonged abuse of defenseless children?

Well, he all but admitted there was plenty he didn't want to make public. But will Deadspin dedicate more than 50 words to this story or will it continue to give Kluwe a pass for having what amounts to infantile, cheap fun at the expense of child rape victims?

Dick pointing at Derek Jeter's mouth? Dick pointing at Derek Jeter's mouth.

Balkan guys stuffing someone into a crate? Does the UN know about this?

Here's a better ranking of the fruits:

Who the fuck eats lemon or lime in a fruit-like manner?

Isn't his bracelet supposed to beep every time he attempts to throw a football?

Isn't his bracelet supposed to beep every time he attempts to throw a football?

Judging by the responses you got, your limb is woefully short

+1 for patiently biding your time until this glorious opportunity arose

Oh, God! They exist in Europe too

+1 can of chickpeas

What happened to the BEARS! tag. Now it's just the weak ass BEARS