For sure. I’m more of a nordic ski racer these days (because Alaska), but the issues are the same. I tell people that I’m just getting good enough now to know how good I’m not. That is, I would technically be capable of skiing with those people (local Olympians, or at least very competitive D-I college skiers) for the…

... seriously, though, how frustrating would it have been to run against Jim Ryun in high school? I mean, dude literally went from a 5:00 mile to 4:00 within his HS career, or something like that, if I remember my running history correctly (really just that one David Epstein book). You could have been competitive with…

“Painfully stupid, yet so perfectly high school running.”

Friendly edit: you forgot the compression sleeves (calf), compression sleeves (arms), $595 Garmin, and visor. Because of course there’s a visor.

I was literally about to put “Milford v Woopie The Clown” into Westlaw. 10/10.

Have to admit that I didn’t affirmatively come here for noumenon, but am thrilled to have found it. Εὖγε.

This comment is criminally underrated.

For sure. And well played.

If this is exquisitely subtle shade designed to imply that someone this douchey could only have gone to Dook or UVA... then I really, really give this comment my strong imprimatur. [look, I said “imprimatur,” I am a lawyer also]

Truth.

This comment is tragically underrated.

(no snark here at all) That is really helpful perspective and commentary. Thanks.

Lifelong runner and t&f fan here, not to mention someone who’s generally acknowledged to have a massive vocabulary (obnoxious but true). And you definitely just taught me a new word with thinclad. Thanks.

True - but you misspelled Dookie.

a wild canon

When pressed as to whether he was sure it was a wild pitch, the umpire responded, “Yes I am and yes and yes and yes.”

Sarah, this is really good. Don’t listen to the haters.

Well, we can be assured that the honorable jurist will if nothing else be truthful. (You know, ’cause ball don’t lie.)

Exxon Valdez oil spill (March 24, 1989).

This comment is highly underrated.