You just tried to call Lizzo “sedentary”!!! 

Touch grass, sweetie. Then go do something. Useful. 

Were you already out to her before asking for the deets about another man’s penis? 

Well, actually - it is. It’s as valid a reason as any other. 

Doctors. Teachers. 

What works best on ghouls? Fire? Or is he a zombie? 

Google exists. 

That’s cute. We need more people boldly defending recently former billionaires! 

You can just see them bonding over sweet tea. And rent boys. 

Let’s see some proof here. Or do you just buy your knee pads in bulk? 

He’s so virulently anti-Black. Like Clarence Uncle Thomas levels of self-loathing. 

They actually earned that money. And Cher “conservative”? Since when? 

Oh, c’mon. It’s straight out of the General Hospital Luke & Laura playbook. It’s Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, who got to soliloquy at length about his attempting to rape the show’s actual hero was her fault, actually. And that was 20 years ago. As long as he’s a he, and is white, you’ll have lots of women…

And really good at her very public job. Can you say the same? 

Leave your sister alone! 

Depends on where you live. My choices are: Kroger, American Harvest, and these guys. I’m using it to make a Mexican soup because THAT IS WHAT I CAN GET. 

Hey now. This will be great for the contractors who rip him off. 

Welp, there’s always the “Gee, maybe I’ll pause my hot take a whole nanosecond before dunking on a grieving woman” approach.

So did my cousin. Big difference, my cousin is an Ebony-black god who actually has to work for a living and be the full-time caretaker of his mother. 

Sorry/Not sorry - but why is this long-assed novel about some rich white gay even here? Rich, did you get confused and submit this to the wrong outlet?