J.R.R. Tolkien did intend to publish a book called "The Silmarillion". Yes, the version that was published in 1977 was put together (and in one or two places, written) by Christopher Tolkien, but from ~1937 until his death, JRRT did want to publish the First Age material as its own book.

Do you seriously think that book every would have gotten written without the dim hope of someday being referred to in an internet post? I know if I were an author, that would be the only thing keeping me going.

A man goes to his rabbi. He says, "Rabbi, I need to talk to you; something is upsetting me and I don't know what to do."
"What is your problem?" says the rabbi.
"Well, I had a son, raised him as a Jew, gave him a good Jewish education, he was bar mitzvahed. And he called me recently and told me he's converting to…

That's kind of what makes the plagiarism so pathetic. Come one, your speechwriters can't even make up their own vacuous strings of platitudes?

Sorry it's not in packets, Mr. Throat Warbler Mangrove? Nay, sir, "Sorry it's not in packages." (Seriously, the fact that he says "packages" instead of "packets" just pushes that line over into the realm of the sublime for some reason).

Wait, to 'crush' something now means to perform it well? Why has no one informed me of this? Lousy youths with their slang . . .

Two steps removed from the world? I'll take that as a compliment.

Well, once, season 1 episode 6, "It's the Arts", in the sketch "The Dull Life of a City Stockbroker". Or, um. . . so I've been told.

That's misleading. Various writers for the site estimated Trump's chances as being very low, but that was based almost entirely on their intuition. They didn't have a model to predict the winner of the nomination. (They did have a primary model that predicted the results of individual primaries and caucuses, and…

octopodes > octopuses > octopi

I've been re-reading my second favorite author, Isaac Asimov. I re-read the original Foundation trilogy every few years, but some of these books I haven't read for a good twenty years. It's interesting, what I remember and what I don't. The Robots of Dawn has way more sex in it than I remembered, for instance…

Only if they've only served one term. The 22nd amendment says that once you've served two terms, no more presidency for you. So, that means . . . theoretically George H.W. Bush could run again. As could Jimmy Carter.

That depends. Are you history's greatest monster?

Sadly, polls are actually quite predictive.

TOS: Spock
TNG: Data (honorable mention: Q)
DS9: Garak
VGR: The Doctor
ENT: Trip Tucker (the only good Enterprise character)

Does she, though? Does she?

I guess by "I'm going to go off script" he meant "I'm going to read off of this script."

OK, I actually like this one. I find his expression extremely comical. And now I hate myself for having enjoyed a "Great Job, Internet".

Well, Kirk's stunt double, anyway.

Sounds like it literally felt good for your lungs.