My facebook for a while was just giving me ads for pregnancy tests and baby products (and vitamins for supporting the healthy growth of my baby!) - seeing as I’m a queer guy in a gay relationship, it was a little confusing.

I got a random mailer from Pampers welcoming me to motherhood. Seeing as my womb is happily vacant and husband just got snipped I have no damn idea what they’re thinking. Is there some “Oh shit, she’s about to hit 35 and hasn’t bred. Quick, drown her in baby paraphernalia” order in the US now?

I miss the good old days when you had to steal urine out of the toilet after your wife peed and then vlog about it for clicks before being exposed as hoaxsters.

In my state they created a foolproof* method for preventing Fetal Alcohol Syndrome: they’ve used $500,000 of state money to install free pregnancy test dispensers in bars. Ostensibly they are to be used before a woman has a drink, just to make sure she’s A-OK to imbibe, but in reality they are emptied by people like…

No, but this is perfect if you’re TTC! Pregnancy tests are expensive, y’all. This is way cheaper. Plus, coupons!

Maybe it’s because I’m getting old, but is Snapchat really that useful for anything other than sending nudes? Like, the snaps I get from my friends are fine, I guess, but I also look at them and think “Do I care?” Like obviously I care about the people, they’re my friends. But, do I care about whatever specific thing…

Yeaaaa the best marriages are built upon pushing and nagging. The more people hear it the stronger your bond will be.

I can’t tell if Jack intentionally led Lena on and messed with her head “as a joke” or everything was same old, same old, and she started reading more into things because of wishful thinking.

I think more telling than the black is the number of garments featuring pants and pockets. It may seem trivial/frivolous, but it’s not. Usually, in my recollection, it’s been people like Sandra Bullock and Meryl Streep who could pullstuff like that.

She looks like that one girl at the prom who’s parents don’t care what she does and, dammit, she’s gonna get everyone talking about her if it kills her!

The E! hosts are really managing to take an important and challenging topic and reduce it to the same level as “who are you wearing” ... sigh. But I’ve been enjoying the actress-bringing-an-activist situation!

Ever gone out in weather so cold that your nostrils freeze?

Oh, please don’t pull strings out of your cat’s butt in future. Apparently you need a vet to remove a trailing anus string, lest the string is wrapped up funny and you tug his little cat intestines into a knot.

There’s usually not as much fur there, so kinda exposed to the elements. Frostbitten Anus is not something you ever want to hear, even if it does sound like a cool band name.

are you telling me that the jade egg in my pussy isn’t removing toxins?

At first I read “Chlorella” as “cholera”and was still like, oh yeah of course that’s a suggestion. To be fair it’s probably a faster way to cleanse.

Goop is annoying at best and a dangerous snake oil/vagina egg peddler at worst. Also, detox is bullshit. With that said, her recipes are fucking delicious. I bought one of her cookbooks after Lindy reviewed it on Jezebel years ago, and I love everything I’ve tried.

It does, thank-you.

The literal abortion pill is not available without a prescription. It is different than the morning after pill, which blocks conception. The conflation of the two is dangerous and irresponsible writing.