Love seeing Cazorla back on the pitch working his magic. And getting to humiliate Courtois not once but twice is just extra icing on an already delicious cake.

“the club appointed Santiago Solari, a former player whose best managerial experience was at the head of the club’s B team.”

It’s really quite amazing what that Champions League trophy can do. I mean, we are talking about a Real Madrid side that finished seventeen points behind Barcelona last season in third place. This was exactly one place behind their only other realistic La Liga rival, crosstown Atletico. This is a team that spent the…

Who knew that 10,000 Days was a reference to the time between Tool albums?

Wild how we always have enough money to buy some bombs and jets and arm our allies, but as soon as the notion of providing our people with health care or a greener planet comes up, we’re broke.

Since the start of Trump’s turn, with a Congress completely under his control, the national debt increased $2 trillion. But somehow, the burden of budgets and debt is always placed on the left. It’s time we let that shit die.

You realize the climate threat is on par with what Lincoln and FDR did? Like there aren’t equal because they’re all different, but in terms of scope and necessity, the New Green Deal is vitally important.

• FELL OFF TOILET, FELL ONTO A MOUSE TRAP, TRAP CLOSED ON PENIS

SMASHED PENIS IN BETWEEN TWO WHEELBARROWS

Hey, leave the breakfast beers out of this.

They’re looking for a nice farm upstate where he can write bad football takes all day! But it has really bad broadband, so he won’t be able to post them.

Let this be a lesson to all of you: never sit directly on a public toilet seat

It was at least good to read in one of the other posts (by whoever wrote the Fun Bag last week, I forget who it was) that Drew had messaged her some words of encouragement. I sort of assumed he was in a coma or something up until that point.

Hey! That's not fair, maybe he has a speech p'dement.

That’s right, dead tired of coming to work at the content factory every day.

What are the actual rules for this? The other guy is right that had this been a high profile media personality from another outlet Deadspin absolutely would report on it. But are they allowed too in this case? I would think that there are laws in place where someone’s employer isn’t allowed to release health details,…

Agreed - an update would be nice, just something like “he’s expected to make a full recovery.” sort of thing. The tenor of all the comments makes me worry that getting back to “normal”, in all its senses, is an unlikely outcome. I feel like if he were literally hit by a car and, aside from some broken bones, etc., was…

Drew is honestly the only reason I began frequenting this site. I started visiting Deadspin because of the FunBag. It would be nice if they would at least give some idea of when they think Drew might be back, or how serous this really is. Every time I see a staff member say something about Drew still being gone I…

I mean, the story was literally, ‘I remember this one time when Drew could eat solid food by himself.  I love that guy.’

I have a few sources.  From what I have heard, it is becoming pretty clear that Drew is going to be named Trump’s Chief of Staff.