Why would you write that?  I thought we were friends?

And every time I see it (which is every day nearly), I can’t help but think of the missed opportunity:

Thank you! I’ve made a GIF of that moment to use the next time someone needs a little educating on how to hold a phone for video:

That onboard video was insane! I kept waiting for him to shift the oscillation overthruster into warp speed and enter the 8th dimension.

“Funding secured”

Lots of early 20th century, Fords also had crank in them.

That’s just not true.

It looks worse than the concept, in every detail.

Bill Belichick used to endorse Starter Jackets:

I’m going to let the team that didn't do the Tomahawk Chop be the first to complain about a lack of decorum. 

And trim those sideburns, Mattingly!

If you are curious, here were the alternate headlines:

Is a taxi company responsible if a driver sexually assaults a passenger? That's happened plenty of times and I don't recall the taxi service ever getting sued over it. Though I do live in Australia where far less suing goes on than the US.

I think somehow a lot of people believe that tariffs are paid by somebody else in the supply chain; or that other countries as a whole are “paying” them.  If they were called taxes they’d be toxic to the supposed anti-tax crowd.  If they were called “make you pay more for stuff with no direct benefit to you” they’d…

The pizza dominoes quickly started to fall:

And  (oddly) a stanced G37 of similarly poor moving ability.  Maybe the treadmill is the Infiniti version of the Monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey, summoning coupes to partake of its foreknowledge that that they will be cast aside as flotsam from the garage just as it surely was.  

That poor gal is standing in the parking lot of a shit industrial estate at 3210 51st Avenue in Sacramento CA. I hope she got out alive, with all her organs and was able to scour off the ax body spray and vape. Someone should send a rescue party. 

Call me a jaded grumpy cynic, but part of me thinks that’s all set up.

I see a lot of complaining on Jalopnik about touchscreen control systems that require looking as well as touching. Please keep doing that. Maybe if the right people keep griping persistently, car companies will eventually realize that we want our knobs and buttons and switches back. Any function the driver is likely…