Gold diggers everywhere are wearing their coach bags at half mast today.

It's like she fell out of the Photoshop tree and hit every branch on the way down.

I feel like this is the kind of guy who would write "NO DRAMA" on his OKC profile.

There was this kooky woman who used to live above a coffee shop where I used to work who got sick of her mail and started writing "deceased" on it. She ended up getting in a lot of trouble because the USPS notified other agencies and her Social Security and other related things all got cancelled. She had to go explain…

"Homer, when I asked if that dummy was to fake your own death, you told me no!"

I once faked the death of some guy who had the last name as me!

You ever really looked at one of those? Like, straight at it? Fucking. Terrifying. Like looking into the abyss, and seeing how you're going to die. The word alone makes me shudder. Dickhole.

Seriously, sport, masculinities, and sexualities. Feels like his syllabi must include "Hey, It's a Compliment, You Frigid Bitch", "Crushing Cans Against One's Forehead", and "All Women Love Jerks: How to Piss on a Woman's Self-Esteem Until She Inevitably Says Yes." I'd say call for a peer review of his studies, but I…

I'm opposed to this because there's not much in the way of bunny production and every one eaten by a hipster douche-bag is one that my allergic border collie can't have made into dog food.

The internet: where you can get yelled at simultaneously for being pro and anti-rabbit because of the same article!

You know how horse girls are a thing? Well, as a kid, I was a bunny girl. I was obsessed with them. All bunnies all the time. My mom, who obviously knew this, tricked me into eating rabbit and laughed her ass off when she told me what it was after I'd eaten it. I was 8. I am now a vegetarian.

I'm not interested in trying it just because I'm not much of a meat eater. But I will take a rabbit fur coat since we are eating them and not just killing them for fashion.

"mono y mono" is wonderful. It has me picturing all these people with glandular fever laid up in bed looking miserable.

That is the best threat ever - "I WILL BLEED ON WHAT YOU LOVE!"

I wonder if she'd asked, "Anyone know a country where diapers are free or subsidized," if these over-blown responders would have jumped in with the same vitriol. Very likely, they would—-because the presumption is that if anyone even asks if anything is free or subsidized, that the person is a lazy bum trying to get…

This would be a great opportunity for her Facebook friends who weren't invited to create a list of reasons why they wouldn't want to go to her wedding.

You know what would be really great? If they photographed the same piece of clothing on a size 2 woman, a size 6 woman and a size 12 woman.

Okay?? Is this out of their new Housecoats for the Depressed and Downtrodden line??

I think it's the exact opposite for me - I exercise because I love myself and want to do good things for my well-being, not to punish myself. I think it is the single best thing I do for myself, both physically and mentally.

First of all, this opens the door to plea bargain discussions, and shows the prosecutors aren't fucking around and the plea won't be community service. Secondly, charging a bunch of separate charges/counts gives the jury the opportunity to convict on a lesser count if they feel like 10 life sentences is too much,…