seriously, jalopnik confusing the hell outta me these days.

Turn in your card and take David with you. 

😝😝

David, you have finally inhaled too much rust from those Jeeps.

You okay David? Blink twice for no. 

Admit it, David. You found Torch’s stash.

There are four main reasons Audi should focus on Germany first and not America:

“I would say kudzu, but you’d plant it, go to sleep, and wake up to 500 miles of interstate your entire world completely engulfed.”

Thank God an expert showed up. Previously we were stuck taking the word of the woman this experience actually happened to.

Look sweetie, sometimes you should just know when to read a crowd, okay? 

basically the Carl Reiners and Mel Brooks-es of the future,

this is gross. everything you wrote here is just mindlessly paternalistic garbage. 

“TLDR: Female, know your place and keep quiet.”

Didn’t take long to find the worst take ever.

It’s awesome that you helped your landlord out by diagnosing the problem & offering to do the repair. Stand up guy David. I do not think you should put any blame on yourself because as I understood it, and I could be wrong, but it is the responsibility of the new owner to have the car fully evaluated by a mechanic…

Front loading washer.

Sounds like a frat boy. And by that, I mean a real piece of shit.