promising to return to the campaign trail soon

Looking more forward to the new Orville season when it comes back vs this pile of QI’yaH

So you’re the a-hole. Good thing you don’t have money then, Josh. You don’t have to worry about acquiring class you clearly don’t have.

It's just common courtesy and class. Obviously the author has none. And yes its because you didn't pay up for first class. 

Not Paul Lukas!

It is almost impressive how he exists in a world of absolute non-truths. It’s not enough for him to lie, he has to say the absolute opposite of the truth. Trump is a walking, talking negation symbol.

They are currently sending out emails to have the HR department switch rooms.

Rick Reilly must be turning over in his grave. 

“...they fear that one of the groups (“Thanos-like”) will be given pink slips, with the other told it is safe.”

Mine are kind of negative? I guess. I always heard “You have no idea how much you’ll love them!” so I had a pretty lovely idea of parenting. But in reality here are my “I wish I knew!”

I honestly thought I’d have a better gut feeling on what to do. Like there would be this motherhood instinct that would kick in and…

I wish I’d known there is no such thing as an enjoyable vacation. The wife and I probably would have done a big trip before trying to have kids, if we’d known how good young kids are at sucking the enjoyment out of everything.

“not all boomers”

Yeah, this issue came up on the Salty Waitress column over on the Takeout a couple weeks ago.

Speaking as pro-employee, restaurants should integrate the costs of employee health insurance into their pricing. Restaurants who insist on this surcharge are, as you say, just passive-aggressively complaining about…

I’m with Darren here. I’ve seen a few restaurants pull this bullshit- there’s a chicken place in California that has a “California cost of business fee”.

Remember, you may have taken time out of your day, but your interviewers (usually plural) all took time out of their much busier days (remember, they’re hiring managers) to meet with you.

That was ... astonishingly incoherent, even for Trump. I can’t believe anyone thinks this man has sufficient mental acuity to tie his shoes, much less run a country. 

Oh no the old white people who weigh 250+lbs are coming!

I’m going to strongly disagree with Drew on the wedding gift. If you’re in the wedding and you have to travel, then your presence (and the grand you sunk into everything) is your gift to the couple. Anyone who expects a gift after asking you to spend that much money to be a member of their wedding is an asshole and…

To be fair, that’s how any company will operate. You want to ensure that your paying customers are the happiest.

How exactly invisible does your child or finances have to be to have them spend $1000 a week on something and not notice it almost immediately in your account?