I just fucking LOVE imagining the conversation they obviously had before going out about not smiling.

Wonderfully written. That is all.

"I wanna poke it"
"and watch it jiggle."
WHUT. Is happening, you guys.

5'11 and heavy. Fucking same. *raises fist*
(Insane Travel Stories brought me here, and this is hilarious. But, size sisters n shit.)

"...your body is killed off very efficiently by systems that don't care about your hope." Nailed it, beautifully said.

Came here to say the same simple thing. Kara has been TELLING it.

Ah, the old "calm down" technique. Claaaassic. :)
My quotes around "us" and the ensuing commentary pretty clearly intone that I wasn't in fact, implying MY experiences are universal. Just the opposite. I made no overstatement in that regard, but appreciate your willingness to check yours.
If your lack of experience…

"Most of us don't know anyone that's ever happened to."
...No, no, no. Speak for your privileged self. Most of "us" know AT LEAST one person this has happened to. I promise you with all sincerity, that is not an exaggeration. Please make an effort to understand that YOUR reality, is not everyone's reality. Your "us" is…

I know a BUNCH, so, you know, checkmate.

Describing Rihanna as "awful [and] trashy" really undercuts the credibility of your username.

Haha ohmygodyes. PEAK artistic expression. *facepalm*

SMH. You can't even call that sampling Outkast, it's just a through and through beat jacking.

And are you guys catching all this? In LESS than one verse she bites (in order); "I Just Wanna Love You," "Girls, Girls, Girls," "Can I Get A," "Frontin'," "99 Problems," "Bonnie and Clyde," "I Just Wanna Love You" (again),…

The second video is my lifeblood. "OH MY GOOWWAAD!!!"

"...photos from this weekend's MTV Movie Awards, left, and last night's The Other Woman, at right." Apologies if I'm misreading, but for the featured photo, the one on the left is from an event in the past, while the photo on the right is actually from this year's MTV Movie Awards.

Great comedy, and certainly your brand of (great) comedy, requires intense candor, or at least the illusion of it. And while copping to your gross/weird/off-putting shit can be empowering, have you ever been too embarrassed about something to include it in a joke or skit?

Right. Her letter was pretty one-dimensional, consequently so was the response. Sucked, because I've personally been waiting for this friendzone headline.

Thank you, I had many of the same thoughts.

Eh, time out. I identify with LW1, and the misplaced, knee-jerk rage really sucks to see. It's not the most articulate explanation, and what follows might not be either, but here it is: I really struggle making female friends as well. I think part (not all) of the problem has been regional, in that I grew up on the…

...she would be correct.

Really interesting to hear your experiences as a female music journalist in the rock world, as I'm currently preparing to exit the shit out of the hip-hop sphere myself. My departure isn't due exclusively to the sexism I've encountered, but it has definitely pervaded my whole career. My favorite was the time I had…