“I will not be meeting with someone who raped me. Never contact me again.”

EXCUSE ME?!? No police report means it didn’t happen?!! Only 35 percent of rapes are reported, for various depressing reasons. I can’t believe you said that.

All of your rapists? How many police reports were made. How many did you report to anyone. If that answer is ZERO, then no one feels sorry for you.

You are disgusting. Totally unaware of what happens when making a report to the police. The further physical violation of cavity probes (albeit by a medical professional) and interrogation intended to push the victim to the breaking point as a way of testing 1) whether they’re lying and 2) whether they’ll hold up on…

...Shut the fuck up.

If that is the case, then it is the terminal symptom of the problem. Making a report is an awful, often self-destructive process. If your sympathy is contingent upon someone throwing themselves into a fire and hoping they can emerge still living, then you didn’t have any to begin with.

I do. This applying of guilt to the victim is a major part of the problem. The minute they reveal themselves, there is always some asshat who steps in right away to blame them.

This idea of what sexual assault “is” has such deep roots that, up into the 70s and 80s many states had rape laws that required proving a) the use of force and b) physical resistance by the victim - which got interpreted a lot of times as any woman who chose not to fight back must have consented (or at least sent…

he’s dangling it in front of me if I meet him in person

Thank you.

I hear you. It’s great that yours wanted you both to be civil. Real understanding of entitlement in evidence right there. I can’t imagine why you declined the opportunity to see pictures of his dinner and which bars he was drinking in on Facebook...What a complete and utter dick.

For your edification, there’s a bunch of comments in here already that may or may not apply to MimiRosie’s specific story, but definitely apply to why should not ask for details first. First, listen. Second, believe. Third, carry that with you going forward.

My rapist sent me a friend request on facebook, and when I declined it, he messaged me saying something along the lines of “I was hoping we could both just move on already and be civil.” I then deleted my facebook and haven’t looked backed.

So my advice is to block that fucker’s number. You don’t owe an explanation,…

Fuck you you piece of shit. The shame and fear that goes along with actually filing criminal action against someone you know raping you is huge. Most people aren’t that strong especially after being abused. You are filth.

Wow. I think you are the biggest piece of shit on the interwebs today. Congrats!

Are you kidding me? Where did you grow up to have so much faith in law enforcement? Do you actually know what happens to women who report rape? Do you understand the secondary trauma of being questioned, accused and violated all over again? Where I grew up the police were the ones we were afraid of. It never crossed…

Kissell13 said, “All of your rapists? How many police reports were made. How many did you report to anyone. If that answer is ZERO, then no one feels sorry for you.” 

The best defense against false reports is the police actually doing their jobs and treating rape like a crime, with evidence and such. Maybe even charges. Because they’re supposed to do those things.

Um, when I assault people I always cloak myself in honeyed pastry.

As we all know, a woman reporting a rape to police (especially a black woman) always has that report treated with respect and empathy. The police always conduct a full, competent and thorough investigation which finds the rapist, who is duly convicted and given an appropriate prison sentence. Rape kits are always…