I really want to meet your uncle and suddenly have a heretofore unknown urge to visit Wyoming.

Flaccid penises are so middle class.

I'm impressed that Stella McCartney actually designed anything that could be classified as cute.

Clearly, all of Wintour's trolling of Kim didn't actually make her explode and she had to cave for the cover.

This is bugging me SO MUCH. Thank you.

A) I'm so impressed that Scotch is currently beating out LI Iced Tea.
2) Good job pitting Blue Moon and Mike's. It was like the booze equivalent of having to pick between the kid who can't throw and the kid who ducks while at bat in a pick-up baseball game.

As such, Mischa, I cannot wait to not hear about it.

Do you think the bagpipes sound slightly sonar-ish to the whales? Like, "Hey, guys, this human is trying to speak whale... badly"

This is attempt three to write my response to this as I kept key-squealing. That is the cutest thing I've ever seen in relation to muppets. The beluga kisses and his little forehead bubble moves! GAH! dead of cute.

Fingers crossed, his middle name is Michael.

Mr. Hunt has cunningly timed his racist White Man March with the many St. Paddy's parades happening nationwide tomorrow... I assure you, he will think he had the Whites out in droves. Drunken, drunken droves.

After his heartfelt chepooka, Ian Somerhalder goolied to the milk bar...

Working out your liver like a champ, I see.

Why did I buy Traveling Vodka in the first place? Now it's just going to go to waste.

But what really constitutes a "vaccine vaccine"? I mean, really? How can we tell?

MONDO - the life-size liquid version of those wax soda-shaped candy things.

I am too! I likewise feel bad for those whose misguided distributors pick this up. (crosses fingers hopes it's not mine)

Seriously. I sell some Chablis that doesn't command that, and it's from acutal Chablis.