I am so sorry you feel alone with this. Please know that you are not alone. I cannot tell you how many times I have heard stories about people being this callous to rape victims. It is truly appalling. My mother’s mother asked her what she had done to deserve being raped and then becoming pregnant by her rapist. Her…

I seriously doubt they spent all those years loving her, for one thing. She was supposed to be of use to them, and wasn’t.

“Good English have deleted their Facebook page since yesterday’s news. In addition to the two now-canceled Matchless shows, Good English are currently still scheduled had also scheduled shows this week at Rock Shop (6/10), Industry City Distillery (6/11) and Gold Sounds (6/12) in Brooklyn this week as part of their to…

They’ve been kicked out of the Brooklyn Northside Festival already. I’ve read on FB that other festivals are following suit.

Even rephrased, it’s still bullshit. Rapists aren’t generally expected to be rewarded for speed, as far as I know.

It’s not really being on your kid’s side when you teach him to refuse to take responsibility for his own actions.

I don’t really understand people like that. I was abused as a child, and I know how hard it is to admit what your parents did was wrong. But if you don’t, you just keep making excuses for all abusers. Of course, it took me a lot longer than I would have liked to really learn that lesson myself, too. Still, it’s…

I finally found that interview:

This is very typical of abusers, in my experience. They cry when they are called out on their abuse, then the people around them, including those abused by them, feel sorry for them. I’m sure some of them do feel some shame for what they have done, but it’s undeniably a neat little trick to get the focus back on the…

“See an abuser? Run.”

He also gave an interview many years ago, which I cannot find, unfortunately, in which he said that, in his family, the kids got hit if they were misbehaving, and they got hit if they were doing nothing at all. Basically, they just got hit. He said he didn’t blame his parents for this at all, because that was just the…

And to add to the ickiness:

He’s quoted in several places as having said that in a 1979 interview with The Telegraph.

If you were also molested, why is it so hard for you to understand what happened to another child who was molested and who grew up to talk and write about it?

It was recommended to me not to get a restraining order, because they don’t deter the stalkers who are most intent upon stalking, and end up, in fact, making them feel more powerful in most cases, because they can see they aren’t really going to have any serious punishment even when they violate the order. In the…

Oh god. That’s just insane, isn’t it? Should you not harbour negative feelings towards a person has neglected your children? How is that more important to note than the original neglect?

Ours wasn’t even court-ordered. She was someone I chose, because I thought she could help our daughter get through the process. All she did was make my daughter not like therapists. She was just so hell-bent on putting our family back together, she wasn’t listening to me or my daughter at all. I’m glad yours was more…

That’s just it - most people seem to think that a record of abuse is enough to get custody, and it’s just not. And even with a conviction, there are still judges who will say that, just because he beat his wife doesn’t mean he won’t abuse his kids, so that should not have any bearing on custody or visitation issues.

Thank you. I’m glad it made sense. I was actually very angry when I wrote it, and I wasn’t sure it I just sounded totally pissed off or if I was making sense.

Thank you so much. You’re very kind to say this.