behold, my best friend’s butt. yes, that is celine dion’s head coming out of the MLS cup. he lost a bet TO HIMSELF after telling all of twitter he would tattoo celine’s face on his ass if the seattle sounders won the league that year. this seemed like a safe bet in march, when the sounders looked terrible. by july he…

I had metastatic testicular cancer about 10 years ago, which resulted in a surgical scar from my pelvis to my sternum. I beat the cancer, and contemplated a decoration for a couple years. For some reason, a working lunch turned down this road, and I told my boss at the time that I was going to get an alien tattooed,…

That’s one of the myriad problems of growing up on a TV show: you can be in your damn forties, married for almost a quarter century, a showrunner and producer and a Goddamn grown up and a huge swath of your audience refuses to see you as anything but a teenager.

Blasphemy! He wants wives to be called ‘mother’ and engage in sex with their spouses with the lights off solely for the purpose of procreation and take no pleasure in it beyond the potential of bringing another of God’s children into the world.

Trump’s trying to start a race war in America, and knowingly lied about the severity of a pandemic that has killed close to 200,000 Americans, so yeah on the whole I’d say he is worse. Obama did many of the same things as Bush (at the very least continuing his programs), Americans generally don’t care as long as the…

*rubs temples*

The Tanners know how to party

I’m totally here for Boobgate, though. It’s a cute picture. I’m sorry, but it is!!!

Joey once got head from a barely legal Alanis Morissette in a movie theater!

Remember back when we all thought W was the literal face of Satan? That America could and would sink no lower? Oh, what heady day those were! Such innocence... Clinton lied about a blowjob and then Baby Bush was all Texan and us on the left had just *stomps feet and crosses arms* had it! I just... yuh know, fuck…

At least Uncle Joey is still not funny.  Not everything changes.

Danny’s act is filthy, Aunt Becky’s a convict, DJ’s boob is getting touched...the world doesn’t make sense anymore!

The first surgery included ovary removal. Because this one is to deal with the cyst, it will most likely preserve the ovary. So they see it as an operation to preserve the ovary, preventing infertility.

It wasn’t a problem until it happened to him.  It’s a Republican trait, it’s not a problem until it happens to them, see the COVID-19 crisis.  When it was hitting the blue states, New York and California especially it wasn’t a problem but it’s a virus it will travel it’s made it’s way to red states and it’s a problem…

Oh my GOD, yes. It’s totally okay to objectify and creep out a stranger, but MY DAUGHTER? 

I would, however, buy toilet paper with her face on it. And his. Is that a thing?

“What a fucking creep,” I thought, when he stopped while we were ogling women so that he could ogle my daughter.

I’m conflicted.  I enjoyed this article and now I want to read the book.