I probably would have had more progress on my case if TurboTax hadn't misinformed me two months ago when I discovered the fraud. Because then I would have submitted the police report two months ago and figured out two months ago that I needed to go down to the IRS office two months ago.

AND, if it makes you feel any better (I'm going through an IRS audit, long story short I was tax fraudED) this is how I spent my night (as told in an email to my coworker):

I know it probably will work out poorly for your relationships with these people, but... Can you drink more whiskey tonight and do more drunk voicemails?

Absolutely nothing to do with this post OR your comment, but I am trying to name my new cat. I read your name originally as Dalia and was like, "That is morbid. But acceptable for the internet." (I read a lot of crime novels and such). And then I read it as "Delilah" and have been trying to envision my new lady cat…

Awesome! Thank you! I have nothing to add.. I literally do the Kinja sites and that's it because I don't know of any others.

I have a legit question (because I am entertained by a lot of these fluff pieces but I would like more real life things): what other websites do you visit?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Ohmygosh, now I'm dying.

The word flail just kills me. I now need to see the clips. Google away!

D'Aaaawwww!

THANK YOU! Like, I'm so wrapped up in my insane panic and anxiety over ruining my cats life when all I want to do is enhance it, that I keep forgetting all of the really good things that could happen with this new addition. Your stories are really nice to hear.

OHMYGOSH I'm adopting another cat this week (it's the perfect time because the rooms is going out of town so I"ll have space to cordon the cat off in while they adjust) and I am TERRIFIED I'm going to end up with an insane cat. Here are the worries, as I emailed them to my roommate when she thought I was nervous about…

I was feeling WAY more bloodthirsty than a simple swipe. My cat is an orange tabby and watching that jackass slide towards him on purpose really really really brought out my emotions and lead to my desire for vengeance. I pictured him pouncing on his face, claws out, back hunched, just FUCKING SHIT UP.

I'm really disappointed the cat didn't attack his ass. Or face. Or genitals. Or really any body part it could find.

Yah, the posts on here made me want to watch ummm, the mean blond girl that is super hilarious... whatever her name is. Anyways, all the posts with clips of her and quotes made me go, MUST WATCH. But then I realized I would rather read something naughty or crime related and decided I mustn't watch.

Ugh, I can no longer look at a picture of Schartzblahblahblah, after reading/hearing about his pardoning of his friend's son who committed murder. Or sentence commuting? I don't know, but he is getting this douchebag out of prison and even after his secret love child poor governing of California I wasn't as annoyed as…

I watched it because I was at my parents enjoying the food. My mom has a Superbowl "Party" every year. It has my aunt, my mom, my sister's old roommate, and sometimes my dad. I stop by for halftime food. I got suckered in to the show even though the whole time my sister's old roommate and I were discussing how much we…

Actress in the sense that when the little kids I watch are pushing out tears like they push out a poop. Faking and trying t*O*o hard. (God, why am I commenting on the Bachelor thread?)

I really do want to know how this originated. I mean, it's funny even without the backstory. But I'm hoping the backstory will make it EVEN MORE FUNNIER.

I got the notification that Gaysian had starred some comment and I was like, "WHAT? Gaysian? Star? What did I write?" And then i realized it was a response to your comment and was less impressed with myself. I didn't even know I cared like that.