I tried to text someone this week while we were in a meeting at work and very obviously fully clothed "What are you wearing?" He responded with, "A polo." I sent a picture of a horse because I was mad he didn't say, "A smile and a wang."

My thighs do weird ass things sometimes, including look wavy. In a bathing suit in the sun? Not a happy camper. So while that picture looks weird, I think of my own thunder thighs and how much muscle and fat I have and think, "It could definitely happen".

hahahahahah, yes! But not all of them. I was hardcore checking a guy out the other day (looked like an amazingly hot version of a guy a date, who was good looking, but in a different way). I worked out next to him last night and actually asked him if he was related (he wasn't) and then internally squealed because he's…

I read the first two sentences of this without reading the screenname and immediately wondered if it was you, barnacles. It was. I felt vindicated.

Bahahahahahahahahaha! Oh my gosh! I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you and the situations. I'm laughing at the asshats. I am a total gym rat female, and I admittedly am scamming on all the men when I go, HOWEVER, I do not pull that shit. I stare, I follow them with my eyes, and when they look my way I quickly look away…

Noooo!!! I do that almost every damn time! I just laugh at the worst times! But then other times it happens and I envision a second me physically restraining first me to keep from throttle said asshole yelling at me. I have been known to talk back, but it's the worst when it's people you interact with on a day to day.…

If the music didn't already bring me good high school nostalgia (nostalgic?) feelings, this video would have made me their fan. I love that he freaks out about kissing a wiener and a dog, but not his own bandmate who does not want his kiss.

Yah, try explaining that to ANYONE who does not understand IBS. "I can't have that, it has fake sugar in it." "But... it's natural." "It still has fake sugar, it will make me sick." "But, why? Just try it!" "I HAVE TRIED IT YOU ASSHOLE! GET OFF MY INTESTINES!"

Only non-sexualized beings don't go there.

Yah, I basically fell in love.

I must be stupid because it's not allowing me to. Thank you for the advice though!

Rapes should not have an apostrophe. Why won't this new commenting system let me edit my shiz? WHY?

It's classic bro dude humor. Not kidding. I saw this guy and was like, "What? Did I go to school with him? Was he my neighbor?" Anything that has anything to do with emotions and/or not constantly being up for a party or laughing at anything they have to say is absurd and should be mocked. Therefore, Jezebel's…

One of those fire gifs makes me reeeeaaalllyyy wish I had seen the show! I TV but the only things I can watch on it are DVDs. Do you know the name? Maybe Google can assist.

Yes! I've always been, "Meh, I care not" about her and her life. She's had some fun loving movies, but I could take or leave her no problem. But this interview I found great. A) Because people are ALWAYS interrupting me when I'm attempting to explain something and it bugs the shit out of me but because I'm blonde and…

I don't know who this guy is. Everyone is freaking out about him. Also, freaking out about the hair touching. I just feel like such an ignoramous because I grew up not knowing that was a thing until people told me about it like, two years ago. I'm glad I know now but I feel bad for people, like myself, who were/are…

I just love the text that goes along with it. And the lion's movements just match perfectly. Thank you, LaComtesse, for making my day.

Maybe that's his 'thing' then? "I'm funny, but not TOO funny. I won't steal the show!"

This gif is how I felt about the accented man. Gay or no gay, I loved everything about him. Also, how did he know he was gay? Or did I miss the joke? I still don't care. I loved him.

Yah, while I feel like I would probably not know what to do in that situation as well (some crazy man dragging me around NYC with a camera crew yelling at people to sleep with me) he really didn't actually DO anything entertaining in this. Remember when Amy Poehler actually interacted and yelled, too? Even still, his…