Its an SUV, there's plenty of space to do something that's better than a push button. People are mistaking their drive button for the engine off button at a fast enough rate to warrant a full recall and fix. The Grand Cherokee's got a small shifter next to the cup holder. It also has a dial below it for your drive…

If the car recognizes an occupant of the vehicle raising the middle finger it changes the XM radio to The Village and lowers the mood lighting. Gotta fight road rage.

Who would even want to come to this team? There's not going to be any marquee free agents that would be willing to move to New York this offseason. They'll have their first good draft pick in forever and they're likely going to blow it on a project center from France that decides to retire and bake baguettes instead.

Holy shit this entire set up is stupid. Why do you even need a push button shifter?

I think they were switching the cans to show that he was only reacting that way to the olives.

Iman Shumpert would be a solid pickup for the Cavaliers if they can get him healthy and on the floor. He immediately becomes their best non-Lebron defender, which isn't saying much but there it is.

I was working as a waiter at a pretty decent steak house in the New England area. Had a woman and her husband come into my zone. I took their drink order and came back to get their food order. Woman: "I'm allergic to gluten, dairy, and nuts. What can I eat?" I proceed to go through the usual list of gluten free sides.…

"What? Kill you? No, no, no. I said thrill you. You know, thrill you with my performance tonight."

You pretty clearly don't have kids.

Aren't there supposed to be laws against drinking and driving?

Filed to: DARREN ROVELL

Something made by GM doesn't work as intended? No way, tell me more.

...so Sauber is done after this season, aren't they. Good lord, the rich keep getting richer.

There's people that leave their motorcycle by itself??? Monsters.

You want Carolina players to introduce their girlfriends and wives to Greg Hardy? That's fucked up, man.

As if we needed another reason to hate Chris Christie.

Jokes on you, that tiny buffet is meant to feed the entire base. For a month.

The Military Industrial Complex can't fuel itself, man. Bring on Cold War 2: Electric Boogaloo.

Except the Russians actually have Iskanders, we don't have Pershings.

Which would accomplish exactly zilch. The current iteration of the ABM would be pretty quickly overwhelmed by the first-strike capabilities of Russia, if it did anything at all. As much as they want to believe it is, the ABM is not intended for Russia. It would be directed at a rogue missile coming out of the Middle…