Hopefully someone let Trump know Vince is really ok.

And a transcript:

I refuse to believe those are his actual progeny.

There’s a screenshot of him watching it, too.

Bless the person who diligently watches the “likes” column on Ted Cruz’s twitter 24/7

Not every day you hit a triple and get a silver in the 50m breaststroke...

This is a systemic failure of democracy. I don’t think most people are competent or informed enough to choose their own leaders or envision the possible effects of various proposals. They see Trump and Bannon as not belonging to the elite because they don’t look or act like it. It’s kabuki theatre for the hoi-polloi. …

What baffles me even more is the white bread and mayonnaise eating motherfuckers that think someone like Bannon and his boy Don really give a fuck about them? I don’t think rich people are really looking out for me, even if they agree with me on some politics. You gotta be a special kinda stupid to believe Bannon…

I’m using this trick at home.

Sure, two things no reasonable person would do while in the area of a potential active shooter would be running or hiding. That kind of activity in that context is so very very suspicious.

I don’t know about percentages, but I guarantee you the lowest possible number is 62,984,825. 

It’s not physically possible, and yet 65% still manage to do it.

Jesus Christ. What percentage of Americans do you think would have sexual intercourse with an American flag if it were physically possible? 65%?

A functioning society?

“Lying is as old as Adam and Eve, and apparently not in and of itself against the rules. The use of lying while ‘under oath’ seems to be where the actual violation is.” — The Jerrys discussing perjury

Yup. Sort of like how hitting a baseball with a bat is not in and of itself against the rules but, say, using an Aluminium bat is. Technology, man.

You should’ve stopped typing after your first sentence.