One of the regulars put together a FAQ that covers this stuff, but to paraphrase it, it’s that no matter how much of an asshole someone is in one of these stories, some commenter will come up with a way of justifying the asshole’s behaviour.

I’m sorry, if you get DUI it’s your own damn fault. Yes, people should avoid overserving, but know your own limits (who thinks it’s safe to have 7 margaritas and drive?!) instead of thinking some sub-minimum wage employee also busy serving other people (who has no way of knowing if you’re driving, either- cabs and…

What about calling the cops on goofy frat boys who just drove your car without permission? Anyone have a problem with that?

Yes. I am all for anyone getting drunk drivers off the street. You know having lost my best friend in High School to a dumb fuck who drove after drinking 4 too many at happy hour. Glad you support the drunk drivers though...

Whatever his motive, he may have saved someone's life - including the customers'. As for overserving, let's assume the customers sat there for four hours of trivia, drinking watery, cut-rate margaritas. That means they got 1.5 drinks per hour worth of alcohol if they even got a full serving in those icy sugar bombs,…

How is it the responsibility of the server to know how someone intends on going home?

That makes me think of the Spanish Inquisition. “Our chief weapon is surprise. Suprise and fear. Fear and surprise. Two. Our *two* weapons are fear and surprise and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope . . . . *Amongst* our weaponry are fear, surprise, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red…

And we all know how scrupulous restaurant bosses are about following those laws, & how supportive they are of servers who attempt to uphold them, right?

Alright, so since everyone is commenting about this even though I’ve already edited it (how?), I’m going to explain what I think happened here. I’m pretty sure the writer of this story originally listed soups/salads as one thing. Being that listing them as one thing in a numbered list of things is patently insane, I…

I’m looking forward to the first person shouting ASSAULT! because reasons.

How dare a server bring the customer what they ordered!

My wife and I just call it TGI O’Chilibees.

Uh, yes. Yes, we are, because fuck them.

I love the idea that he wasn’t supposed to call the police on people about to endanger those around them.

Okay, guys. Not cool. CLEARLY the “Do you know who the fuck I am” guy had amnesia, and genuinely needed the help. Maybe he’s a secret double-agent from the Mars rebellion. Or maybe he’s just from a soap opera. But either way, that was clearly a cry for help, which would have led to a cool ‘80s sci-fi action movie.

“Hey babe, I’m taking you to your favorite! Ruby Tuesday’s!”

It’s a tough one this week, I’m torn between the thrice-served steak & the closing-time soup lady, but am putting my money on the former, due to previous steak-related idiocy. NO, WAIT! Make that the margarita drunks! Fuck, I forgot about them!

The comments section after these revenge stories is always the best. So many Pinkam’s Law comments!