John Oliver punches up a lot harder than Trevor Noah.

Oh, what? Now all white people live in the city? What is it with you bastards? When is enough enough?

Suffered is a strong word in this case, my friend.

I call bullshit. Everyone knows that the only real ethnic slur for a white person is “racist.”

You cannot be serious with this comment, right?

😱 what a terrible accusation. You can’t just go after a mans character like that. He’s probably only murder or something.

She is afraid public will learn Brad is not the father of any of her children. - Maury

I would let out the biggest Starscream ever if this guy was not prosecuted. I would make it my Optimus Prime mission to punish him for this. I hope he gets stung by 1,000 Bumblebees as I Sideswipe his car. In his defense, at least he was not driving a Hot Rod while he did this.

The fact that a Chinese court is enforcing ip owned by a western company was something unheard of just 10 years ago. Awarding damages for copying cars that have the eyes in the wrong place has significant implications on global trade.

Here is what I would like to believe is a reenactment of how Kim felt after that call.

That’s nothing. I got a nasty splinter at my aunt and uncle’s cabin in Colorado years ago. Since then I’ve had a plan for peace in the Middle East that i’ve tried to get heard but no one will take seriously. I even slept at a Holiday Inn Express to make it sound more credible.

I don’t remote believe the Beyoncé gossip, mostly because I don’t believe Beyoncé ever stoops to full on fighting with her enemies. I would believe that Kim called Beyoncé and Beyoncé said nice-sounding things to her, and then Kim got off the phone and realized every last word Bey said to her was absolute shade.

I get it, Lindsay. I cut off the tip of my finger while chopping sweet potatoes and now I truly understand the plight of the Maori.

I thought we were past the ridiculous and totally unprovable claims that someone else could have beaten Trump.

The DNC nominated the person who got the most votes. By a lot.

If you want to cast aspersions, though, cast aspersions on the people in the Democratic party who were secretly (or not so secretly) hoping for a Trump nomination, because they thought he’d be a walkover.* Cast aspersions on the people inside the Clinton…

Well.... President Obama is a Constitutional Law scholar, and a successful politician, and generally a pretty cerebral guy.

Yes, just keep employing those false equivalencies for Obama and Trump.

To be fair as well, i think posts like this one are important and need to be reiterated. Please keep on fighting hamno, you’re my only hope

This feels like hamnos’ “fuck you, im out” post, only instead of leaving for somewhere else, he just goes and becomes a trainyard hobo.