This. Yeah, women have to hoe a row of shit when they’re climbing the corporate ladder, but man, “she has a vagina” is not a reason to set your stance to “DEFEND” as a default. Women can be putrid, awful people who are bad at what they do just like guys.

You don’t have to project and be this angry. There are people who can help you. There's no shame in asking.

I really hope, for your sake and the sake of those around you, that you seek help.

I honestly think you’d be amazed at how much better you’d feel with therapy.

You are clearly not adjusting well and you need help. There’s no shame in that. It’s perfectly normal to need help after a traumatic experience. You’re having trouble expressing yourself, you’re angry, you’re paranoid, you’re defensive and this is no way to go through life.

“all men are untrustworthy. They’re all Schrodinger’s rapist until they prove otherwise.”

Most women do not actively suspect and accuse all men of being rapists until they prove themselves innocent. One day, if you get the help you need, you won’t either.

So you were a victim. That explains... Everything, really.

“As far as I’m concerned” means “in as much as it effects me.”

What does “as far as I’m concerned” add to the quote? Isn’t it assumed that everything you say goes as far as you’re concerned seeing as you’re the one saying it?

Mmmhmm, sure.

Allow me to politely request, on behalf of all men, that you stay the fuck away from all of us, then. Guilty until proven innocent is an absurd way to look at life, no one owes you anything and baseless accusations of rape based on the prior bad acts of strangers really tend to jam up our days.

Yeah, no. You may need help, too.

On behalf of most men, please feel free to stay the fuck away from all of us. Baseless accusations of rape tend to really jam up our days.

“Someone should cook this for us.”

Sounds delicious, though merely as a matter of personal preference, I find the sandwich easier to prepare and devour while hungover.

There’s a market out there for a Thanksgiving Hot Pocket.

There are plenty of sandwiches that crunch just fine. If you want a crunchy sandwich, eat one of those. By your logic, I should dump a packet of taco seasoning in my chicken marsala because I like tacos.

What on earth is lettuce even doing on Thanksgiving? Thanksgiving is a day when vegetables are only supposed to be candied, fried or soaked in cream.

I’m going to go to Wawa tomorrow and grab a Gobbler (for you non-Mid-Atlantic folk, that’s a convenience store deli and a hoagie roll filled with turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce and gravy).