Call me up when Nike makes Cookie Shoes. Then me will finally spring some cash for those damn expensive shoes.

ME LOVE COOKIES, EVEN THOSE COVERED IN DIRT

ME LOVE GOTHAM ALMOST AS MUCH AS ME LOVE COOKIES

It only a slightly racist joke, only slightly

Meanwhile, IKEA still not return me calls for proposal for furniture made out of cookies.

Cecily Strong almost as awesome as Snickerdoodle cookies.

Me and Mark Rylance did a play once together back in…97, I think? Me memory is not it used to be. Anywho, yeah, worked with him extensively a while ago, he really nice guy. Cannot imagine him as clown who devours people.

The only thing more terrifying than this clown is me crippling arthritis.

Very kind of you to offer, but me too over-the-hill for big screen comeback. Me don't have very many years left, so me just hoping to reconnect with me estranged daughter and maybe finally learn how to play piano.

JET FUEL CAN'T MELT ROCK TYPE POKEMON

And here me thought me was crazy for digging through alley ways for spare cookie crumbs at 3 in the morning.

That may be me friend Big Bird. He has had long film career that include multiple Pokemon movie appearences.

Ah, me see you just watched me newest sketch on Sesame Street.

RICK MORANIS

I eat cookies for every meal and now I weigh 843 pounds and am only a few days away from death.

This also applies to getting cookies for free at any store that sells cookies.

It like that date the sole reason they chose to do this promotion! OH ME GOD!

Me defecation is always blue, no matter what me eat or drink, so me totally understand that.

7-11 has the worst cookies.

When NRA commission free cookie day, then me will got out and buy a bunch of AK-47's.